成人论坛

What's your role at Euro 2008?
Put me down as back office, room number 5040, Television Centre. Not quite Orwell's Room 101, but you get the idea. Just kidding. One of my nom-de-plumes within the four walls of 5040 is Euro, which might give you a clue as to why I've been asked to contribute to this blog. With apologies to all your Eurosceptics out there, I love Europe - literature, food, cinema. But most of all I love European football. Sad I know, but there you go.

Favourite team and favourite player?
Liverpool. Jan Molby, , Xabi Alonso. I've always had a soft spot for central midfielders who rarely stray from the centre circle. Very much my own modus operandi as a midfielder of the lower divisions of the London Commercial League, circa the 1990s.

Ideal sporting guest?
That's a tricky one. I'll let you into a secret - most people in sport are driven and obsessional, which makes for very dull company. Having said that, Ashley Cole appears to have unexplored, hidden depths, but sticking to the Euro theme, I'll go for .

Best piece of advice received?
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better - Irish writer, playwright and poet - fellow Euro enthusiast.

Tell us something the public might not know about you...
I scored a goal at Goodison Park at the Gladys Street End in a media game a few years ago. Not a bad goal, though I say it myself. Liverpool greatpassed to me just outside the box and told me not to shoot. Naturally I ignored him and the ball ended up in the back of the net. It was even caught on camera. The video is gathering dust in my loft.

Disappointed the Home Nations didn't make it to Euro 2008?
No. Stuff happens. Am I allowed to say that England's failure to qualify means that instead of a manager whose CV was based on a solitary Carling Cup victory, the national side is coached by a Italian who has Spanish and Italian league titles as well as European Cups coming out of his ears. There you go I've said it. It's not the end of the world the Home Nations aren't there. Remember ? No British teams then and what a tournament that turned out to be.

Will there be another surprise winner?
No. But I'm no tipster, so there probably will be.

Which player will take the tournament by storm?
.

Finally, how many goals will be scored at Euro 2008?
91.