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Paper Monitor

11:18 UK time, Wednesday, 28 November 2007

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

Could it be possible? Could every daily paper have shut down overnight, except for the Daily Star and the Financial Times? It's the first question that ran through Paper Monitor's head when these were the only two papers delivered to Monitor Towers this morning.

It turns out there has just been a mix-up at the newsagents, but it got Paper Monitor thinking. What would the world be like if these were the only two papers that existed? It would be something like this...

You'd easily think that the world is made up solely of white, middle-aged men in glasses who wear sharp suits, and young, blonde women with pneumatic breasts who don't wear much other than bikinis - and often only the bottoms - and Amy Winehouse.

You'd probably decide the only countries in existence are the United States, the UK and China; the only jobs are company director, government minister and glamour model; the only television programme I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! broadcast on a 24-hour loop.

You'd easily believe the world's entire population passes the time attending high-powered conferences, snorting cocaine and doing sexercise - chest press being position of the day (this from the Star, obviously, rather than the FT which is somewhat more circumspect about such matters). When it comes to work, half of us would be on strike and the other half would be under some sort of "spotlight" or "microscope".

Scared? Paper Monitor is.

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