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Quotes of the Week

15:52 UK time, Friday, 15 February 2008

Every week day the Magazine picks a quote from the news and displays it on the .

MONDAY
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"You can't open a Yellow Pages and call a monastery" - - Universal Music spokesman on problem of recruiting monks for album of chants.

The success of computer game Halo has apparently prompted a resurgence of interest in plainchant, and Universal Music is poised to cash in. But how to find these potential chart-toppers? You can't just send an A&R man down to the local abbey. Universal's Dickon Stainer said he "wants people that are genuine, who can sing it as it should be sung. That's not that easy. It's going to be a challenge." Hence the Yellow Pages quip.

TUESDAY
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"I love paying tax. It helps justify how much I earn" – comedian Ricky Gervais.

Success never came easy to comic Ricky Gervais, and now he's in the limelight he seems to be rather ill at ease with the riches that it entails. Speaking to the Radio Times, he also had a pop at how some entertainers do charity. "Why would I go to Africa and film myself crying" he asked rhetorically. Just don't mention the Diana memorial concert.

WEDNESDAY
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"You try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don't have back problems" – Dolly Parton on her back ache.

Country singer Dolly Parton is not the first performer to pull out of a tour because of the strain… but might be because of this sort of strain. The "buxom" Parton – as the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ News website referred to her - said she would reschedule dates after she was advised to take eight days off.

THURSDAY
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"Lookin' Good for Jesus" – Name of make-up brand withdrawn from sale in Singapore after complaints from Catholics.

Do branding gurus never learn? After the Lolita bed, a range of cosmetics guaranteed to offend (this time in Singapore). The range was on sale at three Topshop outlets in the Asian city state and products included a "Virtuous vanilla" lip balm and a "Get Tight with Christ" hand and body cream.

FRIDAY
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"I have always been inspired by the films of Godard, Visconti, Pasolini and Fellini" – First-time director Madonna says this is the standard she's aiming for.

It's two weeks running for the Queen of Pop in Quotes of the Week (and that's a 100% record given that the thread is only a fortnight old). Mrs Ritchie was revealing her directorial debut, Filth and Wisdom, at the Berlin Film Festival. It's about starving artists in London. Reviews were lukewarm.

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