Paper Monitor
11:40 UK time, Thursday, 21 August 2008
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
It's day three of the Gary Glitter Magical Mystery Tour, and there's still no sign of the disgraced pop star slipping the press pack's net as he tries to find a country that is not Britain that will take him in. A conspiracy theorist might almost wonder whether the one-time glam rocker is in the pay of struggling airlines, given the amount of business he must be drumming up for them as journalists shuttle around Asia in a bid to keep tabs on the convicted paedophile.
The Daily Mail's Andrew Drummond claims to have been the only reporter on Glitter's flight from Bangkok to Hong Kong, although Paper Monitor is left scratching its head over why Drummond ends quoting himself in a piece that carries his joint byline.
Naturally, Paper Monitor doesn't seek to be judgmental about the practice of referring to oneself in the third person. But actually quoting oneself sounds "even more pompous", according to a certain column which seeks to highlight the riches of the daily press, yet wishes to remain nameless in this instance.
All the tabloids can't resist the unlikely coupling (in a strictly platonic sense) of former deputy PM John Prescott and glamour girl Jodie Marsh. But it's the Mail that really goes to town with the whole thing, featuring an 11-piece picture set of the pair with "witty" speech bubbles.
And there's more eyebrow arching material on the following page with an opinion piece headlined: "World peace? Give me Putin anyday!" How do we know it's surprising - because we're told so in the strapline above the piece. "A surprising view from a leading war historian..."
If only all comment articles in the papers were given this sort of signposting. "An entirely predictable standpoint from a woolly liberal sociologist"; "A fairly obvious take on proceedings in Parliament from our sketch writer" etc.
Finally, just time to mention the Daily Telegraph's not in the least bit gratuitous "Bodies of Beijing" quiz on its website today, promoted as an "Editor's choice" with a close-up of a female beach volleyball player's bikini-clad bottom.
"I wouldn't be so brash as to provide a hyperlink," said this column, earlier today.
The 
