We think this link will work
/radio4/news/pm/audio/satan.ram
Good luck!
Eddie Mair | 17:12 UK time, Friday, 1 September 2006
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You hoped in vain
works for me! how marvellous....! public service broadcasting at it's best!
All I get is "Satn" is that all it is?
Ok, this did it for those of you who are using SuSE Linux and firefox with built-in mplayer (eh? you mean I'm the only one?) : right click on the link | save as | then copy the text in that file and paste it into a firefox web browser, say yes to RealPlayer, if it asks and let RealPlayer, rather than mplayer, do the work. Sorted.
Was that useful for anyone?
Is there anyway to make that into a ringtone - I think that would be genius! Maybe not so good on a busy train
I say, you chaps!
I have been desperately uncomfortable because I couldn't achieve crap, and felt lonely without Satan's homosexual lover.
I am more accustomed to encountering and causing problems than I am to solving them, but ...
You are about to experience a(n) unique event.
Eventually, I realised that I hadn't sought an update for Realplayer since I got this pc. (It's clockwork - so that will give you some idea.) I hied me away and loaded up the new version, which I think is v.X. My old one was about v.VII.
I can now enjoy crap and satan's lover whenever I wish.
At the risk of teaching my grandma to suck eggs, you can get the free Realplayer from:
/radio/audiohelp_install.shtml
or you can open the Realplayer application and update from there, but be careful you don't choose the "purchase" version, unless you really want it.
Happy listening.
Good grief, I've gone through all that techno palaver, updated etc, but I still can't hear anything. Either I've gone deaf or there's summat wrong with the PC - over to No1 son....
As per - all he needs to do is wave his hands over it and it starts working. It's either a gender or generation thing I think..
PS Is that why updating Real Player required me to fill in my gender and birth year? So they knew whether to treat me with a bit of respect and some patronising messages?
Interestingly (to whom?) discovered my birth year is the same as my age - does that make it a particularly auspicious time of life??
sb8
(Definitely interesting - I now know why H.M. was trolling around the capital with all those chaps in uniform. Thanks.)
You may need to amend your "settings" within realPlayer. (As you say - ask a youngster.)
I may not be deaf any more - but I'm definitely having a dumb moment - the H.M. thing? Elucidate?
SB9
Oh the facism of technology!
Cannot work any ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ downloads or other Real Player stuff cos am still running Mac 0S9...
SB10
It did not work. I will install Real Audio.
I had one hell of a time of getting it. I had to do it the same way as andycratechno (#4), (sorry andy, I should have posted my method to save you the effort, but not sure whether we're allowed to keep these extracts on our computers), - although this is a Slack box - , trimmed off the silent tale, converted to mp3 and it's one of my "You've got mail" tones.
I have no idea why mplayer came across an unexpected end-of-file (it did a fine job with the crap montage), and actually wondered if it was a deliberate trap by the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ tecnos to prevent one saving the file rather than just hearing it.
If the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ let me know it's ok to distribute these, I would then post the mp3s somewhere for all to take. I sent Eddie and Lissa the crap as mp3, asking it it were OK, and, as I reported before, reply came there only the auto.
I see the strap-line has repeated today after all.
Is it really true that Eddie entered this latest blog during PM yesterday?
Is this strictly legal?
andycratechno, am more than intrigued by Eddie's satan file as I am gay anyway. Have worked out that the original file is a .ram file and created using Realplayer so you need Realplayer downloaded and installed on your PC before you can open the file and read it. I already have Realplayer and downloaded and saved the satan file but having a heavy cold and far too much whisky at the moment sloshing around in my guts at the time of writing I can't remember exactly where I've saved the sodding thing to....
Eddie also needs a few tips on blogging, trees, roads and cups of tea are simply not enough. For example, Sept 5th is very much my significant date as I reach the fat old age of 60 and have just had my photos done in a Tesco's booth for my bus pass application. On PM Eddie said his photo looked like he had eaten the whole of Sainsbury's and I told him to cut out a couple of cream cakes. Well I know photo's make you look fatter but the booth flash I've just had done has made me look like I started in Sainsbury's and finished in Tesco's. The photo's are actually not that bad but the flash has wiped out my bottom lip so that it looks like I haven't got any bottom teeth in. As a matter of fact I've got all my own. Have so far tried using a bit of pencil on the pics but my first efforts then made me look like I'd been smacked in the mouth by something. On a more serious note, PM is still the best thing on R4 if you want serious news and discussion to catch up on and relax to. 'Today' is fine to get up to just to hear the headlines and put the kettle on in the morning while you crawl back to bed for a bit, and then turn John Humphrey's definitely off.
sb16
Valery P, your 7 & my 8:
I attempted to solve your puzzle about year and age with an obscure reference to the real reason for the 2nd June 1953 festivities. I remember them well, but that was clearly the peak of my mental discipline.
No, this link did not work for me either... Come to that I never got the montage of people saying "crap" to work either... or the link that was on some time ago to the PM theme tune.
Is the fact that I continue to try a triumph of hope over experience?
sb18
AW your 15
Start > search > file> satan or is that too easy?
Did you try loading your photo into Paint or Photoshop before resorting to the felt tips?
When I went for my bus pass I forgot to take my passport etc. The nice young lady gave me the pass anyway.
I must have an honest face ... or something.
Jo N,
How old is your realPlayer? See post 6
John (13) - If we, the listeners, are not obliged to concentrate intently on all that is said during an edition of PM, then perhaps it’s only fair that Eddie shouldn’t have to.
Alan (15) - If you can’t find the saved file, perhaps ‘My recent documents’ would be a way to access it.
- Following your definition of PM, if you want serious news without the relaxation bit, I would always advocate The World At One. It should be easily found in the schedules.
- I don’t refer to John Humphrys, but there are more than a couple of regular Today contributors who irritate me.....
SB119 - no, SB19
Er, I just clicked and heard it, can't understand the fuss.
Mind you, I am young.
I think you need to be a certain type of person (e.g. male) to fully appreciate the Charlotte tone!
I'm yet to tire of it!
On a technical note - the .ram file can be read by Notepad on Windows - it's just one line :
rtsp://rmv8.bbc.net.uk/radio4/news/pm/audio/satan.rm
if you paste this into a browser it might work - it might ask if you want to use RealPlayer for this protocol, or something, click yes or ok, then RealPlayer should pop up with satan's homosexual lover.
andyc.... - that last bit sounds faintly in need of censoring?
Stephen, Leader - salve! how's things on Pluto?
Sarah - congratulations, I too was once young, sigh.............
I just clicked it, too (OSX, Firefox) but now when I try to get R4 on Realplayer all I get is Charlotte.
I reiterate an earlier point - where in the R4 male voice that could do for women what Charlotte does for (most, if not all) men?
I'm being heterosexist, I know...
I've been carefully monitoring the quality of the radio programme to see if it has suffered since Frank and the gang have had to provide us with all this extra nonsense.Well I can report, from my point of view, the programme is equally as good as it always was. Doesn't say a lot I know. Only joking. I don't even mind Eddie going on about blogs/newsletters/websites unlike Monty Don, whose mentions of special editions of Gardeners World only available on broadband, make me want to spit my trowel. Lord Reith would turn in his grave, but not before the Cbeebies website had danced on it. The RADIO programme is wonderful. Thanks.
Do you think Charlotte could read this a little slower so I could edit it.
Rufus 18, I've just taken everything along for my bus pass with the hope I could apply for it one day early before my 60th, politely told to bugger off and come back on my birthday. Did have a book though that I want to post to friends in Spain and it costs £2.20.
Dr. Hackenbush 19, is that your real name, and are you a gardener by any chance ?. reason I ask is that I once knew a scots guy who went by the name of Dr. Checkpants. if you are a gardener perhaps you have a field to put the grumpy John Humphrys in and he's definitely in need of a bit of tlc. and get rid of his angst. R4 take note.
Frances O 24, Eddie does it for me but not for a sexual reason. I might be gay but the reason I listen to PM is it's because it's the most balanced news programme on the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ at the moment and the most listenable, I had my chance to work in the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ newsroom years ago but walked out of the interview when I realised that the overdressed, perfectly made-up, cardigan waring round the shoulders pinned with a broach manequin who was interviewing me did not represent the company I hoped to work for. As a metter of fact I was sent there by an agency. What it did do was give me a new perspeciive of life as I knew it at the the time but was disappointment all round, Lots of corridors with red lights on and that was before I made it as far as the 'cardigan'.
Alan (27) -
Sure, this is my real name. I ‘work’ at the Standish Sanatorium, which I can just about see from here at the race course. Dr Checkpants was one of my esteemed colleagues until he got struck off. I’m not a gardener, and I don’t have a field, but you can sometimes find me in the vicinity of a pond.
Frances O - I can't believe you had to ask! Eddie, of course, Eddie! (Except when he says "Boosh" rather than "Bush").
Genius!
wish you were here this week Eddie?!!!
You have said on Radio 4 that you have more photographs on 'Window on Your World' but not on our computer yet.
Sincerely, Gladys Holding