This just in...
spoke to Chris and it's Reindeer. Stand by.
Eddie Mair | 13:51 UK time, Wednesday, 29 November 2006
spoke to Chris and it's Reindeer. Stand by.
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Its Santa!
I meant, it's Santa!
Don't want Lynn Truss on my tail. We had the same English teacher.
Eddie,
I hate to be the one to point this out, but it sounds from the above that Chris Jarvis is the happy father of reindeer.
"Congratulations, Mr Jarvis. It's reindeer"
Ho ho ho...
For anyone not of a Python pursasion, confused by Eddie's sign-off today on the blog, check out
And I want them all back in working order. No feeding them mince pies, they will get enough of them in a few weeks.
Can you check if Rudolph is down there - he was supposed to stay here, to help plan the route but I can't find him at the moment.
S. C.
By the way Eddie, have you been naughty or nice. I can't seem to find you on either list, and I've checked them twice!
Is this the weather forecast, dear?
Are the Reindeer doing their publicity tour before Christmas then?
I think Eddie's getting his presents early.
Eddie,
Your'e just passing the buck!
Dear Cyril
Have just got the newsletter.
Can you be said to be or not to be an entire bee?
We all love you semi carnally
The other half bee
Q: What is Michael Winner’s favourite type of weather?
A: It’s rain, dear.
Now you know why I ‘work’ as a doctor, and not a gag writer
Reindeer? Not a bee then?
Can a bee, be said to be,
Like the Pope, visiting Turkey?
Or like a fat dog, eating too much tea,
Or taking photos, on Tuesdee?
Singing:
Lah-dee-dee, one two three,
Eric the half a bee,
A, B, C, then M after P,
Eric the half a bee...
We love this presenter, employee,
Of the famous B.B.C.
Who's nearly as cute as little Fi,
And much more than Sean Conneree
It's Eric the half a bee!
(The end)
...either that Big Sister 8, or he's in the present early...
Does anyone know if the London Wasp's Rugby Club have a 'B' team?
SSC:
Great stuff!
Stephen (3), No you don't. And I'm glad you did - makes me feel less disturbed...
Richard (4), Very helpful, thanks!
Santa Claus (5), he's been naughty, but, in my opinion, not nearly naughty enough. I'm ready when he is though...
Rufus (9), :-)
Rufus 8, Dr hackenbush 11... very good indeed.
I think you'd both do well in this competition:
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are last year's winners:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
14. Glibido: All talk and no action.
15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating
Mae reindeed i mewn 'r Cymraeg fynddoedd.
P.S. I have just got back from watching Waldorf T Flywheel prosecuting a crown - something he showed a pitiful lack of ability to achieve....
HURRAH - the categories work.
Thank you Eddie & Lissa for looking after us. X
Oh, Dr. H, are you a Flywheel Shyster and Flywheel fan too?
Does anybody know where recordings of the shows can be found? I taped a few (should I be saying this?) but sadly not all. We still laugh and laugh at them.
Richard (4) - you are a very bad man!! Was aware of the Python related sign off but not of the website you so kindly directed us to, and on which I have just spent a very enjoyable half an hour refreshing my memory on some of the real Python classic moments, when I am supposed to be working.....oops!!!! It doesn't take much to distract me!! Its now bookmarked for me to wander off to when I need a wee chuckle... thank you!
Lissa, you are so so clever. And so well organised.
What will you do with the threads which don't fit into those categories?
I only ask ........
Perhaps an index?
Piper (17)
A great list. Thank you.
(17) Piper:
Thanks. A good friend sent me those only today.
(20) Lissa:
Good work. You will of course now be whipping the Tuesday newsletter paperboys (and/or papergirls) into action next.
(22) Big Sister:
Yes, how did you guess? The ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ released six episodes on audio tape. A well-known Electronic Auction site seems to have copies available at the moment - or indeed well-known Book Ordering site. I wonder if you have any of the episodes which were not available for sale, as I would like to hear more... There was also a book of the original scripts, by Mike Barson.
Dr. H
Will look out what I have and get back on that one.
Are the tapes for sale any good? From what you say, I imagine they're incomplete ...
Yes, they’re very good. Six complete episodes across two cassettes. I can describe more fully if it helps.
Dr. H
Let me look out what I've got and we can compare notes.
I think they get repeated on Radio 7 sometimes, but I've never caught them since their original transmission.
Nice to meet a fellow fan.
Mr Foxtrot-Oscar (14)do you really want to know about rugby Teams? Why & why do I know such things, they have; a FIRST XV TEAM, a GUINNESS A TEAM (CALLED ZURICH A or the RESERVES in previous years), AND AN AMATEUR TEAM. They also have a LADIES 1XV & LADIES 2XV.
HelenSparkles (30),
Whilst your post was very informative it was not nearly as amusing as Mr Foxtrot Oscar's, I'm afraid...
I'm very confused, being a bear with a very little brain, why was Mr Foxtrot Oscar funny? Did I miss something again?
HelenSparkles (32),
Wasps, Bees... what with Eddie's newsletter sign-off and the general theme it was chucklesome...
But, as I said, you were much more informative :-)
Thank Aperitif (33) but I feel only a bit less of a twit because I didn't get the newsletter today, for the first time ever, and only had half an ear tuned into PM tonight. I shan't dwell on it though! :-)
BTW, did something happen to my newsletter, I am suspecting a consipiracy having only just about it never going AWOL from my inbox?!
Ok it's a verbal thing, my beloved just asked me if wasps have a B team & I got it! At last huh.
Ok it's a verbal thing, my beloved just asked me if wasps have a B team & I got it! At last huh.
No newsletter here either....just because I was praising you yesterday for sending it at lunchtime, 2 days in a row.
HelenSparkles (36,37)
Sadily, I noticed a very similar joke concerning american wasp specialists unable to indentify the buzzes, as they were listening to the "B" side - that was in New Scientist a few weeks ago.
HelenSparkles, How come you know so much about this particular team anyway?
DeepJohn, Listening to the B-side of what?
I say you chaps!
I once found myself eye to eye with a goat and noticed that its pupils were rectangular - two or three times wider than they were high.
I can't tell from the photos whether reindeer pupils are round. Can anyone help?
I.S. (41)
Yes, reindeer have rectangular pupils.
Horizontal slit pupils are common to sheep, elk, red deer and, I believe, horses.
Possibly something to do with improved peripheral vision to detect prdators.
Prof: In the case of horses, the effect is only slight, their pupils being almost round. In goats it is quite pronouned, which makes them look so different.
I'm sure your theory has a lot to do with it, and it certainly accounts for their eyes being set wider apart and to the side of their faces.
As compared to the fox, wolf, dog, etc., i.e. the predators.
Big Sis (43)
Thank you for the confirmation.
My opinion of horses is that they are unpleasant at one end and dangerous at both.
Aperitif (40), "listening to the B side of a record [of American wasps buzzing]".
'twas rather late when I started last night, the glass was neither half full, or half empty, but needed a good top-up.
DeepJohn (45),
Hope the glass is full and ready to go again now :-)
I definitely posted something here - good wishes to Deepthroat Johnthought - but it must've offended someone as it hasn't shown up.
Aperitif (40) because I am a Londoner who recieved it via osmosis from boy type people who were into Rugby. Useless all round usually, so you see I had to seize the moment, even though it revealed how slow I am to get a joke!
HelenSparkles, not at all - I was impressed with the breadth of your knowledge.