My Christmas gift to YOU. Parma Ham.
...and there will be another audio posting tomorrow. Please enjoy this moment from the PM archive. I'm posting below, the explanation from an earlier posting that might - MIGHT - help explain this.
Clare English and I were presenting. As was the case then, PM Letters appeared on a daily basis. We would take turns at writing the script each night.
This particular evening, out of the blue - Clare burst out laughing during the live reading of the letters. She lost it completely - tried to get it back - then lost it again even more.
The trigger word, as it turns out, was Parma as in Parma Ham. Once we were off the air (it took THAT long for her to stop laughing) she revealed that a mutual friend of ours was to blame. Stewart would always amusingly pronounce Parmesan cheese by hugely prolonging the 'a'. Paaaaaaaaaawwwwwwrmesan. Well, maybe you had to be there.
Anyway, it seems the way I said Parma Ham that night put Clare instantly in mind of that, and set her off, out of the blue. You can hear her on the clip, through laughter, saying something like "It's the way you said Parma".
Clare and I had worked together for years on PM and before that on ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ Radio Scotland so we were well used to coming close to setting each other off with giggles. This was our most spectacular fall. My favourite bit - if you turn up the volume very loudly - comes right after I've finished speaking, when Clare can be heard squealing with laughter still. All the time I was talking she had her head down on the desk and her shoulders were shaking like a cement mixer. Why we weren't fired I don't know. We did get one or two emails saying we'd been very unprofessional - but many many more saying what a good laugh it had been.
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Hahaha! I shall smirk all the way to work now!
*Happy Christmas!*
Great stuff! Thanks Eddie, Clare & team.
I've just been listening to a debate on Radio 4 about the causes of happiness, by a miserable bunch of grumps. If they'd just listened to that clip, they wouldn't have had to debate at all.
So before I make a start on the mountain of chocolate I've just unwrapped - my family and friends know me so well - I'll just say *Merry Christmas one and all!* and leave you with an impression of Dame Edith Evans I created on IRC the other night:
"Bah huuuuummmmbuuuuuug?"
Excellent!
Merry Christmas everybody!! Hope you all have a wonderful day.
Brilliant!
Mary
Merry Christmas, all!
Um - I can't see what I need to click. Help?
Frances 0 - first paragraph of Eddie's bit. There's the word 'here' underlined.
Click!
Fifi
Nice one! Merry Christmas, all.
Merry Christmas froggers. I am giggling with the memory of that one. Lx
Priceless, Eddie! HC to you and the little elf with an a.
You really are our stars!
Bless Clare,
It was worth the wait, Fabulous!
Merry Christmas
Thanks, fifi.
Great Stuff, Happy Christmas.
!!!! HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE EVERYWHERE!!!
Only just got round to listening - but worth the wait - happy Christmas all!
So for admin annie and Fearless it's in the audio store at the bottom.
The loudspeaker icon is the Windows media stream and the sheet music icon is the MP3
all here
If you click on the line of info about the file it has a link back to the Christmas blog
Well is's all over now - been too busy to comment until now - clearly jonnie wasn't cooking all day
I noticed jonnie's dignifying your remark with silence james? Happy Boxing Day to you both anyway, and keep the Boxing Gloves off....
Re chocolate SSC - I was hunting the house for some last night, what strange kind of a Christmas was that when not one of the 4 of us was given any? Had to settle for mince pies with Ricky Gervais....So can I have some of yours today please?
Actually I did reply to james, Valery, but it didn't appear!
It was actually quite polite and offering him a glass of Toddy if he'd like to pop around.
Unlike james, I don't find the need for saracasm on the blog - especially on Christmas day.
Poor Clare! Mad Mair!
Quite right Jonnie - sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.
My first encounter with sarcasm (the first that left a lasting impression) was from a Geography Teacher at school. I realise now that she must have resorted to it because of some kind of insecurity, but she really used to make me feel bad. Her only other - equally unsubtle -technique for managing a class, was to catch a pupil's attention by throwing the blackboard duster at her - the sort with the wooden handle on the back?
Hmm, thanks for letting me share that with you.
Val P - we too had a teacher who used to do that - in NZ. Our primary school class had 50 pupils in at one point, generally the roll was 48, & the teacher could only get from front to back of the class by climbing over the desks. Fortunately he'd been in the army so was very fit- but this meant his aim with the chalk or duster was very good. Oddly enough, I don't remember anyone resenting the fact that he threw the chalk to get our attention (only threw the duster a couple of times, perhaps even he thought it was a bit extreme!)
Strange to think back now & imagine parents & students faced with such conditions. I'm sure there'd be an outcry. But we were very happy with him, & he was an excellent teacher. The first one I'd encountered who had a carefully worked out incentive system of coloured stars for good work. Incredibly complicated, but so exciting to finally achieve that gold star!
We had a teacher when I was about six or seven called Miss Rafter (and yes she was tall). She had red hair and wore knitted emerald green suits.
She used to hit you on your knuckles with a wooden rule if you said Yes, instead of Yes Miss Rafter. I was so scared of her that one day my mother asked me a question and I said "yes Miss Rafter" instinctively. Good for my mum, she went to the school and confronted the woman, but even my mum came home frightened of her.
Mary
mMary, I still cringe with embarassment when I remember the time I called my form teacher "mummy" when asking to be the one picked to do the "reading out loud"! To be fair I think I was about 7, maybe one is easily unfocused at that age?
Okay, teachers' names.
Pity Miss Proudfoot who became Mrs. Pratt!
Or a friend of mine who began her teaching life with an uncontentious surname but married a Hogg. Needless to say, she kept her maiden name in the classroom, and the kids never knew the truth!
My own surname is also the name of a local town. When I began teaching, the youngest kids kept saying: Are you really Miss X? and I didn't at first twig that they thought I was a 'beauty queen' for the town of X, as in Miss World. Some time later we had a mufti day and I dressed up as Miss X complete with sash. Happy days!
Big Sister (24)
That sounds like an invitation to a good competition. Can I have the first guess?
Were you Miss Bourton-on-the-Water?
Well then, what about Miss Llanbedr-Dyffryn-Clwyd?
RJD, this could go on forever.
Mary
RJD - Or even Miss Llanddewi Brefi - No, sadly not. It's a historic town in rural England. I'll say no more. But you can keep guessing - This is fun!
What about Miss X-eter?
Valery P - (23)
Maybe your teacher felt as I did whenever a child called me Mummy during my 20+ years as a supply teacher - I took it as a compliment that the child felt happy and relaxed with me.
Just realised I didn't thank Eddie and the Team for their lovely Christmas pressie.
Lovely fun!
madmary (27)
It's okay I already know the answer - but don't tell anybody. It's Miss Theddlethorpe St Helen.
RJD: But that would make me a Helen, and I'm neither her, nor a saint!
Try again!
Apparently, because of the town/island I was born in/on, I am a 'Brandane'.
Can anyone guess where that is?
More to the point, does anyone know WHY that is?
I'd really like to know!
Fifi the Brandane
Hi Everyone and 'appy Christmas (hahahaha),
RJD, quit with the guessing now... you know where that got you last time...
Fifi
Easypeasy. We all know that you originate from the Isle of Bute (you told us yourself some time back) and consequently you must know the following:
Brandane is the name given to indigenous people of Rothesay. Historically Brandanes were warriors or soldiers who formed a private bodyguard for King Robert II in 1372. The original name is thought to have come from a saint of the Old Celtic Church.
Is there a £5 prize that I can claim?
Appy
You know that I will always think of you as an oily prat.
Sorry - It was such a good line that it had to be repeated!
RJD, do you have perfect recall or a really good filing system??
Valery P
My motto is: "When the search engine fails - make it up!"
The search engine worked this time.
Gosh, Fifi, I misread you and thought you were a brand name.
"Fifi" toothpaste, perhaps? Brightens up your smile.
My illusions are shattered RJD...
"Fifi" Fixit! :o)
I've never actually tried this Noily Prat stuff - is it as nice an aperitif as a large dry sherry? Or a perfectly formed martini?
Was out drinking cocktails last night (Sloe Gin Fizz). Delightful! In need of "Fifi Morning After Medication" now (other brand names are [more widely] available)...
Nice strapline Fearless.
I first tried it in a hotel cocktail bar in Jesmond, sometime about early 70's, when a friend was doing a stint behind the bar, and distracting herself from being a student. I thought it sounded incredibly sophisticated!
Hi Valery,
Jesmond eh? I used to live there! Although in the mid 90s rather than early 70s.
Never mind how it sounded -- how did it taste? (Um, you were talking about Noily Prat weren't you Valery? -- I've just realised that it may've been a Friday and thus something else entirely...)
A, x.
Ha, ha, ha Ap! Sadly i was talking about Noilly Prat. It tasted good. Other tastes are available, I seem to remember :o)