Saving Private Russell
(Whew!!)....What a day! 70,000 people packed into Wembley stadium, over 100 different bands performing at seven different concerts in six different continents. This was all a part of the "Live Earth" series of shows, aimed to help in promoting the idea of us saving the planet by reducing our carbon emissions. Of course, the irony that an inevitable carbon footprint would be created by the very staging of such an event did not escape some detractors. But on the whole, I think that raising people's awareness is always a good thing and besides, I'm sure that we all agree that the planet does need saving on many different levels.
One man who almost certainly needed salvation of some sort, was the host extraordinaire: Mr Russell Brand. Aside from introducing some of the acts, giving TV interviews and presenting the live radio show (with an extra hour), Russell was struggling with a serious migraine. I was sitting with Matt in the back of our tiny little tin shack of a mobile studio (parked in some forgotten car park located beneath the stadium) when he received the ominous call, "Matt, I've got a blinding headache...I can't see". Hardly the words that anyone wants to hear at the best of times, especially not when we're in the middle of a huge worldwide concert and millions of people are waiting.
Yet a few migraine pills later and it was all stations go! What happened next is still a blur to me. Russell was rushed from the main stage into different studios then back onto the main stage again throughout the day. He was followed around by Mikey who was carrying a little transmitting pack and a microphone so that we could have Russell presenting the radio show as much as possible. Wembley is a very large stadium, so back in the hut we could see this huge mass of stylised hair darting around everywhere at a frenetic pace. One minute he was in the TV studios, the next minute he was on stage, then he'd suddenly appear back into the radio studio for a brief chat before being magically whisked away somewhere else..... (I'm sure that I even saw him dancing in the crowds at some point!).
I don't know how he got through it with blistering migraine, I mean there was barely anytime for him to eat, drink or....er....(anyway, moving along!), but it all made for a fascinating show. Russell managed to place his bid to become the next Dr Who, competed with Madonna to impress a group of school children and declared his "interest" for one of the Pussycat Dolls (only he couldn't remember which one!). It was like witnessing this crazy cartoon where everything is happening at once and then you suddenly realise that you're not quite sure if there's any plot!
I'd written a little poem about "saving the planet", but with the mad rush of the whole day there wasn't time to read it. Still, I don't think that there were any words that I could create that could truly capture how crazy that day was!
Hi Mr Gee, Russell should put his head on his cats tummy. The purring rumble is really soothing on the brain and it鈥檚 a really nice thing to do. I often wake up wearing my cat as a hat. x
You all did a great job - poor Russ having to get through the show with a migraine though. xx
This time of tourin is going to take its toll. Russ sounded hardpressed on Satday. Poor Russ. He feels like a puppet, but its just the pressure.
The tour may feel like a cattle market , being shipped ere there an everywhere, and performing. The whole tour is homage to your talent though, Russ.
I was thinking of moving in with you Russ, in my more desparate moments last week.
I imagined it to be an umble chez nous.
Instead its full of Blingin goatsedz an the like.
mmm gawn off the idea now.
Your interior desighner was last seen workin wiv Ozzy Ozbourn, no?
Now, the revolution needs rethinkin. I,m not avin you throw your weight around.
Religion is good if it helps people to feel good.
Castratin, or neuturin people is a bad idea.
Dont suggest people onlyav 1 child. Big families are nice!
I wish I was in a big one.
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
After 6 days away, at last my son returned home from his action adventure holiday camp.
It was excrutiating for me, in the evenings,not knowing if he was ok.
My mind telling me that all hell was letting loose in the room he was sharing with 7 other boys.
I would sit in my room and try and send waves of protection to him, imagining meself poised infront of him, to protect him like a lioness would protect her young.
I would growl at the attackers.
Its crazy but seemed the only plausible defence I had for him.
I'm a great believer in the power of prayer. What a non believer would call sending positive energy.
I do believe that Jesus loves and protects us in his will totally.
On this week though, my faith was severely tested. I thought,"what did I do to send him!'
I had'nt made the decision prayerfully.
It was more littluns desision.
I had said to him,
"Right, over the summer, theres going to be no playstation."
In response, he asked where the action adventure form was, because he would fill it in and take himself to the action adventure camp for 6 days.
A punishment to me and nice long distraction for him.
The week flew by, I willed it to.
When he returned it transpired that mobile phones were the the norm, evertyone had them.
It would have made the whole ordeal bearable for me, to make contact each night.
In the blurb, they had recommended no such items were to be taken.
To be honest I guess my boy was well shot of me for the week.
But I felt powerless and berieved.
Bofore he left, I did the old overcompensating. Buying items that came to more than the cost of the holiday. Top notch camping rain coat, when there were perfectly good ones for a fiver. A novelty Transformers drinks canteen. Hiking shoes, which were half price, but still alot. Non of which I could afford. I had a second sense that I was wasting me money , but just went into overdrive to comfort myself.
Packing for the journey, was really exess in essence.
Normally he,s barred from buying those chewing gum tablets, coz invariably he chews the whole lot at once and it loses its taste in the same time as eating one. So after payin 75p, the whole lot's spat out in 5 minutes.
But against me best judgement I packed the forbidden treat of extravagance.
Along with chocolate bars, sweets,a big bag of cherries. [he loves cherries] . Grapes,three nanas, oranges and 2 lovingly prepared roast chicken, ham and cheese, cheesy topped rolls, wrapped artisticly in Scooby kitchen roll and cling film.
First of all I brought a rucksack that looked big enough,only to find I could only fit 2 towels and jarmies in.
So I purchased a bag of mamoth proportions, just to be sure he would have everything he needed.
I was able to pack more and more as things came to mind, including comforting spiderman blanket for emergencies at sleep time.
I had to give him a toothbrush and toothpaste that looked relitively sensible, as his tweety pie on rollerblades, battery operated brush may have caused him to be berated. Not to mention the pink berry flavoured glitter gel toothpaste that sits in the bathroom to be used once a week.
So he returned in 1 piece on Friday. After the journey home, as soon as we had walked in the door, I was amiss to where my long lost son had dissapeared to.
Bemused and shaking my head I was to find him firmly parked in front of the telly, as if he,d never been away and time was set in stone.
As communication seemed a bit inaccesible, I set about discovering the wonders of the holiday away, by unpacking.
Finding out what inlightening, information I could, from the clues in what lay in those bags.
Well you might not want to know! The smell was the first thing to hit me, as I opened the travel rucksack.
In the main compartment ,I lifted the books and magazines to find in the depths ruined paperwork,that was damp stuck together and had scank written al over it.
EUuugh!
The second part of the bag, to my horror was pretty much the same lot I had packed a week earlier. The lovely roll, was a mystery until I recognised it for what it was, misshapen and flattened. Grapes spilled out everywhere, the cherries dripping,rancid and mulch.
3 brown squashed bananas.
A very soggy,wet box of what looked like chewed gum but still just about hanging on to their tablet form. All untouched.....
The tube of sweets I carefully opened with my nails and dispenced into a cup,as with the choc.
Well there has to be something in it for me.
The packaging had just about kept it ok, if a little squashed.
The mamoth clothes bag was a bonanza.
I took Marge Simpson like pride in putting the fist load in the wash.
It was blissfully satisfying.
It was all a bit of an open insult to my meticulous care and effort, of trying to provide for my child. Going to the expence of buying things, for last details that would enhance his enjoyment.
The washbag with sensible ablushion regalia in it - completely untouched.
I pulled out a metalic action adventure camp logoed lovely red raincoat, that they had evidently supplied, a logoed, quality, large silver drinks canteen. The same logoed shower toiletries and a couple of foldable hair brushes.
The new shoes had apparently been well used and covered in mud during the week, but hadn't made it home as they were apparently left at the front door of the camp. I didnt mind as I was so euphoric to have my dear beloved little man returned to me.
Later when I had prized littlun away from the telly, I pressed him for stories of horror and trauma.
There was one bully in their room, who bent his thumb back.
The boys had collaborated to squeeze most of their tubes of toothpaste on his pillow and inside his bed. But he said he merely turned his pillow over and put a sheet over the bed.
They told him he snored and had been throwing their foldup hairbrushes at his head and they were surprised he didnt have a headache.
My little tough guy didnt even flinch or wake up.
The one thing that had caused a problem and was of great annoyance, over the period of the whole week was the nickname most of the camp gave him of, "She Male." Because of his lovely long hair.
That is so discriminatory and "hairIST."
Imagine adults mocking another bloke with long hair.
They'ed end up with a bunch of fives.
I think it came to a head a few times and littlun was reduced to letting his fists do the talking.
He's got a little cut on his finger from some broken glass on the windowsill and one finger has cracked at the bottom with exzema.
I have lovingly applied hydrochortizone cream. We,ve had loads of cuddles and kisses, bonding again as mother and baby.
I asked if there was any dirty talk and he said it was minimal.
Yesterday we went to see the Transformers film.
Phew!
it was a hell of a job to keep my eyelids from permanantly shutting!
I was frozen at one point, by a most unexpected blatant garish direct reference in the diologue to; "Masturbation!!"
Then it was openly discussed as lovely, special time!
I was visibly choked and inwardly embarassed!
Considering this the type of flick will attract young boys of the Transformer kind, it seemed so out of the ordinary.
Imagine if on the packaging of the toys, they would write; Transformer toys actively endorse masturbation.
WELL Mothers just wouldnt buy the toys. Or hastily bin the packaging. Theres sometimes lengthy contact with packaging as you unwind the wires that hold them in place sometimes though.
SHOCKING!!!
Just a sign of the times.
Hey, there, whats new?
When are you recording the Saturday show, done it, doin it,or will it be live?
Now the tours over, I wonder what you've got planned.
Are you doing Edinbrough festival?
I bet now the tours over you must , in some ways be glad. The life of the hectic showman is exciting and invigourating. Sharing yourself with everyone, and keeping the ball rolling. A rolling stone gathers no moss as they say. You can keep evolving moving into new teritory while on the road. It s a kinda therapy too.
Once you settle down to domestic life the dull, boring old, same old same old, reapears.
In show bizzy, the question on everyones lips, is always,"Are you busy?"
At which point any flicker of unsurity can be read as judjment, "Can he really hold the fast tracked, high paced, life of pressure, down?"
Show biz must be so cut throat.
You,re a comodity in some peoples eyes, and just as good as your last performance.
Real freinds are hard to find.
The same applies to the real world only probably slowly, worse!
I, m leaving it in your capable hands, Russ, to turn the world to a less expectant place and a make it a more innocent, giving place. OK?
I,ve decided,
instead of thinking I,ve go S.A.D.
Seasonal affected disorder, that I have now got R.A.D, Russell. Affected. Disorder.
No, not really, but things are quite potent at times. What started off as, mild amusement and the new thing to brake into the mundane, has become a volatile, whirlpool of canundrums!
Well for my tiny, insular life and head. All of my own making of course.
I cant really go out in the sun today.
Yesterday, I had to walk about an hour to take littlun to a lil open air concert for his summer guitar club.
I dutifully sat and enjoyed the concert, but, got fried.
I,ve never seen my chest so red. Its bordering on purple. So I,m taking refuse in the I. Bar, until later. I might go for a swim then.
I,ve enjoyed recounting the events of meeting Russell on Monday night,to my freinds. but do feel R.A.D,now.
I just cant get him out of my mieeeeeend!
Think I,m using him to mask some deeper disatisfaction and pain.
If thats the case then, all is well, coz I aint going to face all that loada pony, this day or any day soon.
Till it creeps into my concious mind in managable doses, ready for neatly skimming oft, and disposing of.
Who are we, where are we, why are we here? What do the relations in my life mean.? Why cant I get close to any one? Why cant I stand the ones who are supposed to be close? What a loadv al garbage. It won,t ever make sence. I don,t think it were ever supposed to. Maybe for a chosen race of people, who's lives are beautifully rolling along with effortlessly, unquestioning, continuity.
God bless the man who has his own, in the words of Ald Billy. How lame am I?
Questions like that, are best kept for sunny climes, powdery skies and buzzing beez in the heat.
I, wrote a poem last night. I hope you like it.
Songs of Summertime,
Simmering subconciously.
All of the days longings,
Following with ease.
Floating, bobbing, blowing,
The distraction of sunshine
Satisfaction sweetly singing the breeze.
Restfully relaxing, a comfortable state,
With sences merging and mingling
Fresh weathered skin gently tingling,
Staying supported,contented until it is late.
Melodies of memories past and present,
Goodwill giving her generous scent,
Remembering a rite that is mostly pleasant,
Recalling our purpose and how it is meant.
Following inhibitions, niggling nuances,
Combat attack, overcoming the struggle
Make amends, make freinds with assurances.
Allow it to surround encircle my head
Hatch a plan that will happen instead.
Clarity climbing, closing in,
No need to nurture a nature of sin.
Pleasing, power of pertinence, take over within.
Releasing responsible reasoning,
I have not my own sensible seasoning.
But my eye sees the sight of a permanant glint,
Favour, fermenting, forming a fragranced hint.
Committed, compassion, considering the shift.
A lavish, life, longer, left only to lift.
This is the thing, right,
Theres room for you all
No, you're wrong the order ain't that tall.
You think to get there
you have to be good and true,
But it aint always about you.
When you were born you were helpless,
All of your needs were taken care of.
You were hapless just by nature.
So to expect you to perform,
Would be a misguided plan thats folorn.
Surcuming to the idea that,
We are lord of our own destiny,
Has a song that,
Is maudlin, you gesture me.
Hey! Take flight, sing out the melody
of angels, let the light flood your
sight, lift the sentiment to fables.
Those ancient doors will open, sticking
Finger in pores that breath mortal.
Though our bodies groan and reach for the stars,
Our spirits rise inhabiting Mars.
There ain't no place we can't touch, feel, exude.
This morsel of dignity will serve as a prelude.
I won't spend on you, from my own resources.
I'll share from the exess of my inner joy,
Overflowing and through my mind it courses.
On you, nothing is wasted.
I won't give out, expend, share, something beautiful
For no return.
You will join me, feed from the same
Source we are reborn.
Gone are the days of throwing my pearls
To the swine.
To be trampled underfood,
Dissapointment from wasting my time.
This time it will be different, divine.
Look, share, become slowly aware.
Focus, enlighten, allow your sences to heighten.
Coarsly tear off all that encumbers,
Throw off your doubt cast it asunder.
Set your face against the storm and thunder.
May it turn around and wonder,
To see a destiny coloured with good intention.
Its gunna be good, wait and see.
We're gunna have a ball,
Ahh, I can't wait.
Something beautiful will form,
Take over our sences, elated we will raise
Out of ourselves,
To mingle with heavenly extasy.
It's true, it's true,
I cant wait.
Shall we begin?
I can feel it's call.
Come, come,take my hand, shut your eyes.
In reverence we fall, aglow with
Passion to embrace the All.
Glittering visions set alight.
Fiery, powerful, forceful, meaning,
Raised to flight.
Considered, settled, substance bearing in,
Changing the world as we know it,
everything
Oh,joy!
Like highland fling!
A kiss so tender,
Melting, touching.
Healing, renewing, putting pay to our sin.
Soaking away all the stuff deep within.
Set eyes in amazement to blaze,
Be seduced, raised up,
In consumations haze.
Posting paradise,
Give me a slice
OOh you cheeky thing!
I saw you cradling your sexy chin.
Your face was intent on
Listening in.
Theres something in the air,
Intently, snatch a smile
From the fun we will share.
Fat sumo wrestlers
Pulling each others hair
the small pony tail
Trailing in
the air.
Mmm, what about, a shout at the top
of your voice when youre out.
Wasnt me!
Just run, who gives a snout.
Ah, the mundane monotony
We need to break,
Lets create some vibes
to shock and shake
Ay! Tell me whats on your mind?
Right, thats it. I,m going to leave them behind.
They what!
No, cummon shall we
givem a taste of
their own kind.
No! sure! Ok,
Youre right, we,ll try to be nice.
together we,re goin our minds
to spllce
I,ll take all the good in you
You can rest
an I,ll make the mix nice and true
transformed we,re all, tickedy boo!
Now we,re ready to take them on.
We,ll charmem, shmoozing,
No need for boozing.
Flirt with our frisky
confidence oozing.
Coz youre worth it, Me ald China plate,
What you on about
you wont look a state!
I,ve never known a personality like yours,
Ah, you,re so beautiful,
My heart soars,
When I fink of your
Cute smile
Its YOWE I adores!
Honest, have a liitle hope
In yer ability
Youve aquired some pretty,
astoundin agility
You look slik and lean
Its time for us to have a scream.
Shall we run around
Paint the town red?
Your right, Its got to be said.
The world is ours
To you I will wed.
No its not some ugly joke.
Whats happened to al your hope
At the weddin ther.ll be such fun
All our mates will happilly come
The fire of life we will stoke
lacking losers will go up in smoke.
So wadaya say, lets do this, hey
You get one chance at life
Dont be caucious
I want it wild and raucus.
OOh I say
You are nawty,
I,m going to keep yo in my sights
Now you 've got goin
Cant av you gettin
haughty.
Hold my arm
Lets skip down the street
All our life
All our power
We will meet.
I would like to cogratulate, Gordon Brown, for bringing our boys home!
Now we are all together again, as a country united.
Time to re group.
We can think of inovative, new, up to speed, constructive, non violent ways to help the country at odds with itself.
Providing life changing solutions, over a table of debate, to the civil unrest.
Removing our own guns and presence from the situation can, I think, only serve to alleviate some of the pressure.
In a place , we quite frankly have no place!
Or rights of duristiction.
In view of the dubious invasion, we were there under false pretences.
To withdraw British troops, was a very brave move of G.B.
David Cameron has challanged G.B. to a face off, open T.V. debate to challenge him. With the view to see where is loyalties lie, in the new style politics. To my mind Gord has proved himself magnificently already.
By paternally making a protective gesture, to step away from the rollercoaster of casinos, as an idea of regenerative provision for our towns.
David Cameron seems to be praised, applauded and loved in wonderment for his, sterile, impotent, infantile statements on how to deal with the countries problems.
I would like to cogratulate, Gordon Brown, for bringing our boys home!
Now we are all together again, as a country united.
Time to re group.
We can think of inovative, new, up to speed, constructive, non violent ways to help the country at odds with itself.
Providing life changing solutions, over a table of debate, to the civil unrest.
Removing our own guns and presence from the situation can, I think, only serve to alleviate some of the pressure.
In a place , we quite frankly have no place!
Or rights of duristiction.
In view of the dubious invasion, we were there under false pretences.
To withdraw British troops, was a very brave move of G.B.
David Cameron has challanged G.B. to a face off, open T.V. debate to challenge him. With the view to see where is loyalties lie, in the new style politics. To my mind Gord has proved himself magnificently already.
By paternally making a protective gesture, to step away from the rollercoaster of casinos, as an idea of regenerative provision for our towns.
David Cameron seems to be praised, applauded and loved in wonderment for his, sterile, impotent, infantile statements on how to deal with the countries problems.
You in Americkie yet?
Ah! Itsn still lovely weather.
Went for a swim in the sea today. Still warm enough.
The beach was all deserted now schools av gone back. Just a few bathers.Sonny jim and I learn a bit of grammar, German and chemistry. With the lapping waves as our backdrop. I nicked one of those sun loungers,only o av it taken back,by the chair boy. Coz I didn av 拢3.50. So I ad to lie on my soggy blanket.
The other day we were down at the beach, my mate an I walked to the toilets. [Usually go in the sea, but ad dried off]
On our way, we were commenting on how the kids don,t get picked on so much ,now they are getting older.
When we came back, my mates girl said that an old lady had told them off for playing with the showers. She had said that they were wastin water and that she would call the man in charge of the shower.
As the little girl was tellin me the old lady came up to us.
She started shoutin at my boy.
I spoke to her. I was respectful as she was so old. Over 80.
It turned out that she didnt have her own grand or great grand kids. She backed off a bit when she learned I was local, and paying the exorbitant water rates.
Pacified, that it was the last day of the holidays and the promise that they would be back at school, today.
Although, it was a lie on my part, coz my boy don,t go school!!!
Home education is a real option!
You dont need to be a teacher.
Today when we left the beach, littlun had run ahead and gone up the zig zag. As I was leaving the beach, there was a guy sittin there on the prom, with his hand in his pocket, flapping it vigerously.
Theres always got to be one. It wasnt enough that the sun was shining and twinkling on the beautiful calm mill pond sea.
Well I guess its an imperfect world we live in.