Damaging Dolls?
| 08:03 UK time, Wednesday, 21 February 2007
I've discussed the issue of and their impact on young girls with some former and present fans (my 14- and 8-year old daughters) and they say they don't get it. I pointed out some of the objections made in the American Psychological Association report, but they said "wasn't the same fuss made about Barbie?"
(We finally let them have Barbies after vigorous resistance because they kept getting them as presents from friends at birthday parties - they promise me they are unscarred.)
There is a possibility that concerned parents are transferring their own natural fears and insipient guilt to imaginary 'unconcerned parents' - I showed something of that when I spoke on the programme yesterday about my shock seeing five-year-olds wearing T-shirts carrying the word 'flirt' or other apparently sexually provocative slogans. I even said "you wonder what their parents are thinking..."
Maybe their parents aren't thinking at all - but maybe that's just my prejudice. Perhaps their parents have decided that making a fuss just makes a passing fad led by peer pressure more dangerous than just letting it go.
My wife and I certainly worry about the effect on our daughters of pop videos and fashion mags. When my 14-year old showed what I judged was an unhealthy interest in the kind of hip hop music that uses lyrics denigrating women I rushed out and bought her some feminist classics. (Generally that's my solution to most problems - buy a book.)
I'm not a psychologist (well amateur, like all of us) and I wouldn't argue with the APA even if I wanted to - which I don't. Marketing thongs and lacy knickers to 7-yr-olds seems weird and dangerous to me, too.
And I'm surprised and disappointed that in recent years so-called lads mags valuing women only for their body image have become more popular, not less.
But if that's a failure by the whole of society, or just by those who publish and read them, maybe it's too early to say.
And whether girls who are taught to respect themselves however others behave towards them can push through the barriers of ignorance and prejudice (and they'll have to because no one in the West is forcing the dolls off the shelves or closing down TV channels) we're bound to find out.
Below are some of your comments on this issue, to worldupdate@bbc.co.uk
From Jim McManus, Bar Harbor, Maine
This message pertains to the story on the sexualization of girls. I am using this conduit, to send this message, because the topic has not been posted at: /blogs/worldupdate/ I think this story confuses sexuality with superficiality. The doll maker is correct. Just because a girl plays with a doll does not mean she will act like that doll. However, if her parents and their friends expect her to act like that doll, then she probably will. Parents who expect their daughter to act like a doll are demonstrating extreme superficiality. Girls who grow up and base their personality on a doll, or a TV character, or a pop star... are also demonstrating extreme superficiality. Sex is not the problem, it is people who are to superficial. They should start reading more books. And I mean good books, not those stupid romance novels. This type of story comes up frequently. Usually with predictable conclusions, like the story above. However, I have noticed that as a male I am still having to initiate most relationships with women. Occasionally, I meet a woman who initiates a relationship, and I love it. It is so refreshing! I think if it became more common for women to initiate relationships, they would have more control over those relationships, and more control over their life in general. The question is, why do the majority of women still play a passive role in initiating relationships? This is still the case even in countries like the US or Great Britain. I also find that the majority of well educated, carrier oriented woman still play a passive role in initiating relationships. It is the great secret that we never talk about. It would be easy to blame this on men or the greater society, but I think it has a lot to do with woman. All they have to do is ask. Jim
From Mohua Mukherjee in Washington DC
Dear ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳
I listen to your 5am show on NPR in Washington DC. I wanted to respond to your lead story this morning, about young girls' self esteem and body image issues. It's a very totalitarian peer pressure system that drives this, and the dolls and the clothes are just playing into that. The thin girls are born with an advantage and their mothers actually play into it because they have come through a similar pecking order themselves. I came to the States as a college student, and I got a rude introduction into this value system in the very first year. I remember wishing quite a few times that my own mother had forced me to be thinner while I was growing up! I agree that it's very destructive, and the first step of banning models who are too thin is a good one. However, it will take more than one generation to change this mindset! Men have to speak out as well.
MM
From Paul Simons, Pennsylvania
Dear Dan Damon & World Update,
About the sexual objectification of women - yes in the west the Madonna/whore dichotomy and the younger-and-younger wearing of revealing and suggestive clothing are problems, but they pale in comparison to the subjugation, nullification, 'honor' killing, and genital mutilation that is the lot of women in the islamic world.
Right after today's program I opened the morning paper to and article about Ms. Hirsti Ali, the Somali/Dutch woman who had to flee for her life after saying what I just did.
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