And you thought
you had a bad day at work
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Spiders invoke
a primal fear - like that of snakes, claws, or Bobby Davro.
Nev Pierce
A terror that
is almost universal. How to amplify that fear?
Well, try thousands
of spiders. The size of horses. That's the premise behind "Eight
Legged Freaks", a throwback 50s-style creature feature minus the
reds-under-the-bed subtext.
The avowed intent
here is to scare without scarring, shock without being shocking.
It's creepy
crawly horror for all the family.
The town: Prosperity,
Arizona. The set-up: toxic gloop infects a lake, from which insects
are taken and fed to the inhabitants of an exotic spider farm.
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| I hate
the summer. Always too many insects sticking to my windscreen
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The result:
giant spiders. Hungry giant spiders.
"You're not
going to believe me because I'm the kid and they never believe the
kid", says, er, the kid as he warns nice-but-dim Chris (Arquette)
of the town's impending doom.
But soon enough
Chris is a believer as, teamed with Kari Wuhrer's comely female
sheriff and Doug E Doug's paranoid comic relief DJ, he's on the
run from a variety pack of the evil beasties (jumping/trapdoor/orb
spiders etc).
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| Big hole,
made mysteriously. Emmm. I'd better stick my head in and see
what happens |
Taking a scant
ten minutes to set the scene, writer-director Ellory Elkayem isn't
from the slow-burn, shadow-lurking breed of horror film makers (plus,
his producers here are "Godzilla" makers Dean Devlin and Roland
Emmerich - hardly masters of subtlety.)
He's got huge,
computer-generated arachnids to play with, and he wants to have
as much fun as possible.
Initially smart-mouthed
in a "Lake Placid" fashion, as the spider chase schematics stretch
out so the dialogue downgrades (Doug E Doug's jive-talk is plain
boring), but really, you won't care.
Flick your
brain into neutral and let your nervous system be your guide. Arrggh!
GIANT SPIDERS!
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