Past Poems
Jeremy looks back to a poem he wrote 20 years ago fuelled by anger and frustration and recognises how he's changed.
"Twenty years ago I was a glum young man who thought he was a poet. He slept through most of the day and at night wandered the deserted streets of cities and Northern seaside towns. And he wrote stuff like this:
"No moon to cheer me with her smile
And the stars glitter
Like distant teardrops all the while
The birds have long ceased their singing
And my heart no longer stirs
The cold breeze sets my eyes stinging
Freezing my face moist with tears."
It goes on a little bit about angst and lost loves and ends up with what is
"And once more the still quite a lovely little couplet: grey streets
Will swallow us whole.
And our tears will join the stars."
But he was fuelled by anger and frustration. Enslaved by desires he hardly understood. He believed that humans deserve their looming extinction.
I wasn't a happy chappy - people described me as 'too intense' - and I did kinda like that Romantic 'Graveyard School' of suffering for the sake of art.
And the world has turned seven thousand, three hundred times since then - and the sun rises.
From the kitchen of our mountainside cottage I watch the dawn break. I quietly gather myself for the day and hear the floorboards upstairs creak softly - my wife and new daughter are waking up. This is how it was meant to be.
Not that I'm oblivious! Oppression, exploitation, bigotry, fanaticism, complacency - I know all those things are still there, just as I know that the trees and mountains remain when it is dark.
Now, I am grounded, in my life and in the landscape, I am driven by inspiration and achievements - desires have been identified and satisfied. The future is filled with surprises that I am ready to deal with.
I found a landscape of love, and find it populated with a family of fine friends.
We are inseparable.
'The land and the king are one.' "
Jeremy Dean