Alicia Douvall shares her story about becoming an adult
As part of the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ Three Adult Season we've been asking you to share your stories about becoming an adult. There have been some amazing stories so far and so we asked Alicia Douvall to share her experiences of becoming an adult as well:
I don't feel I ever really became an adult and still don't believe I'm a proper one now. I was chucked out of home by my parents from the age of 14 and went to live in hostels. My mum had to sign a form confirming that I was homeless. You might think that moving away from your parents turns you into an adult, but not if you move to a hostel. They provided me with tinned food, a bed and a place to wash. When the nuns came they gave us special treats like biscuits and blankets. Once they let me keep the whole biscuit tin. I kept that tin for ages because it made me feel cared for. But I still didn't feel like an adult.
Eventually I found a boyfriend. He was visiting London from Sunderland and had his own place up there. When he asked me to move in with him I jumped at the chance of finding out what it would be like to live in a stable home. So I packed the few possessions I had into my biscuit tin and caught the train that would carry me to a brand new life. I settled in to his small, one bedroom flat and found myself a job at the local cafe where I made cups of tea and bacon sandwiches. I began to feel happy for the first time in my life. I loved my job in the cafe and coming home to my boyfriend every day. It didn't last forever, of course, but perhaps this was the first time I felt a little more like an adult than before.
You can watch Alicia Douvall in Glamour Models, Mum and Me tonight at 9pm on ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ Three.
Tell us about your experiences and share your stories about becoming an adult.
Comment number 1.
At 3rd Aug 2010, louisesk wrote:I think this programme was very well presented, i think that Georgia and Alicia must have a very good relationship. Alicia has come a long way 'on her own' and has not made the same mistakes with Georgia in fact she has 'broken the cycle'. Her money from her work has bought the things that she feels will secure Georgias life and by making this documentry its obvious that Alicia has 'aired her insucurities' and now from seeing Georgia from 'the outside' realises that she needs to make her choices in life and that Georgia is not going to abandon her mother just because she is 'moving in a different direction. It was lovely to see a young girl so content and mature. I have a daughter very similar and i know that sometimes like Alicia its difficult to grasp how is it possible to have a child with such a 'grown up ' approach to life and accept you for who you are and not worry what others say
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Comment number 2.
At 4th Aug 2010, lift-and-shift wrote:This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the house rules. Explain.
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Comment number 3.
At 4th Aug 2010, JShambles wrote:Watched 3/4 of the programme last night and the rest this morning on iPlayer. An excellent and touching documentary that moved me to write and say 'Well done' especially to Alicia and Georgia. I had negative preconceptions about Alicia from the newspapers (the comparisions to Jordan/Katie Price are inevitable) but I was pleasantly surprised to discover a genuine and caring mother learning about herself with help from her daughter - whom she really does love. Georgia in the meantime is just amazing. She shows wisdom, maturity and gentleness that should be applauded - even more so given her age. I hope that they both continue on their paths together - different, but the same - and wish them every success. Its hard not to watch the documentary and realise that they are two wonderful people in their own rights. Bravo!
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Comment number 4.
At 4th Aug 2010, Sybil wrote:I found this show very worrying and am astonished that anyone would think that this child and mother have a good relationship. The entire relationship is based on the mother's needs, the mother's wants and not about what Georgia needs or wants. She had to miss school as a result of the mother's needy desire to alter her body and to control what Georgia does with the rest of her life! Georgia then had to take care of her mother-not because of a legitimate illness, but because things she was choosing to do to her own body came back to haunt her on a trip that was designed to push Georgia into a career she clearly did not want. She continuously tells her mother and the producers what she (Georgia) wants, but the mother chooses to ignore this. This child is busting her backside to please this needy person. I feel bad for Georgia and my hope for her is that she will grow up to be a healthy adult in spite of her mother. There definitely needs to be some sort of professional intervention as a matter of urgency!
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Comment number 5.
At 5th Aug 2010, EwanM wrote:I've never signed up to one of these blog type things before, but I felt that I had to leave a comment, after watching the documentary on ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳3 tonight. I couldn't sleep so I thought I'd leave a comment.
Alicia seems to be a very caring, considerate woman, who sadly has had a lot of bad press. She made a big impression on me tonight, I was very impressed with the woman I saw on the documentary, even though I saw the problems she is experiencing with her self image.
Unfortunately in today's world, the press/media can often be far too concerned with selling their product, than getting to the heart of the matter, and sadly people like Alicia get caught in the crossfire more and more frequently, which only adds to the internal torment she must be experiencing.
I would never wish to be a celebrity, but I can appreciate the attraction of getting the 15 minutes of fame that people seem to crave, Alicia is one of these people who crave it. Partly I guess from wishing to get acceptance in her own mind about how she perceives the way she looks.
Alicia has a daughter that adores her no matter what, and although she is just a teenager, she is wise beyond her years. It was refreshing to see a documentary which was not about personal gain, or an attempt to point score against former partners, you just need to look at what a newly remarried celebrity has done of late...but I digress.
Alicia, sadly has not had a happy life, but she is doing the best she possibly can for her daughter which is highly commendable and definitely gained my respect tonight, and I feel for the position she is in, she has done a wonderful job of bringing up her daughter, who seems a very intelligent, charming and well adjusted young woman.
I personally think if Alicia was to take more heed of her daughter's concerns about surgery, it would help her heal herself.
She needs to find herself a man, who will accept her for her, and see her not as the model, but as the woman who is only trying to gain acceptance in a world which sadly is only hurting her and causing her grief and anguish. She needs to avoid footballers like the plague, and keep her personal life as private as she possibly can.
I seem to remember that another model experienced, similar problems regarding body image too, I think it may have been Miss J. Marsh.
Working in the industry she does, is not the ideal vocation for Alicia considering her body image issues, and this is where she could benefit from making these documentaries I hope and hopefully find a new path for herself.
I can only commend her on the way she has brought up her daughter, but I would urge caution with pushing her daughter toward the industry she works in. Let her find her own way in life, and it will help maintain the strong bonds that lie between mother and daughter.
Alicia, is a beautiful woman, beautiful in the sense that goes beyond the physical, in my opinion beautiful encompasses the physical, the way we conduct ourselves and the person we are. She came across tonight as being a loving, caring, considerate woman, who I think has sadly just been affected by events and by the modelling world in which she exists.
I truly and sincerely hope she comes to terms with her looks, and listens to her daughter about her fears regarding surgery.
I hope that the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ is assisting her with the counselling regarding body image, and that as a result the ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ sets up a helpline or website to assist those experiencing similar problems to Alicia. Perhaps Alicia herself could become involved to help others who experience the same issues regarding body image.
If she were to read this herself, I would strongly suggest she considers a change of career, before the attraction of surgery gets to a point where it is making her health fail. I think it is this that is concerning her daughter in many respects, and that she needs to really consider her future and her daughter's future carefully.
She was very brave to come forward and do this documentary with her daughter, and I also commend ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳ for having the courage to make this documentary.
In conclusion, Im sure her daughter will be well regarded in whatever career she chooses in the future, if I could, I would tell her to stick in, and work hard at school, do that and as the old saying goes, the world is your oyster.
To Alicia I would say again get out of modelling, find something different before it's too late.
You don't want to end up like the italian model who was addicted to surgery, I don't say that out of malice, but to make her, or those reading this consider the dangers of lots of cosmetic surgery, and to make her remember that her daughter wants her mum to be around for a long long time to come.
I hope that Alicia manages to come to terms with just being Alicia, and I would like to say keep up the good work with Georgia, she is going to turn out to be one very lovely lady, and is a real credit to her mum.
Kindest Regards,
EwanM
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Comment number 6.
At 5th Aug 2010, RubyThornton wrote:I’m a bit of a sucker for this type of light hearted documentary, having quite a ‘serious’ job during the day, its nice to watch something where one doesn’t have to think too much. However, this was a well construed objective piece of film making and vacuous, it was not.
I don’t know too much about Alicia Douvall and what I had heard certainly wasn’t positive. However, that’s the way that publicity and fame works these days so who am I to judge on how she makes her living? She obviously has her reasons for doing so and I have to say she has provided very well for herself and her daughter. Which brings me on to Georgia. What a completely delightful charming well brought up, intelligent, well educated girl and indeed a credit to her mother she is. However, it also provokes a debate on whether an upbringing does also determine your character . Perhaps the old adage ‘Nature over Nurture’ can be applied to this situation. The relationship between Georgia and Alicia was more Edina/Saffy like than the Ab Fab characters themselves, at times, I thought, is this for real? Alicia also jokingly states that she cannot believe Georgia ‘came from my womb.’ Georgia really did want to work at her books than think about her prospective modelling career and that I thought was really praiseworthy. Comically, however Alicia attempted to lure her daughter into the world of glamour, the more Georgia, bless her, dug her heels in. Ironically, Alicia’s experience with her implant after the flight to LA and her further reconstructive surgery in Nashville must have surely put the frighteners on Georgia even if past experiences hadn’t already deterred her and steadfastedly she nursed her mother after the operation with the necessary drugs and dressings.
So to surmise is Alicia a good role model? Possibly not, but motherhood isn’t easy and none of us is perfect and I am guessing under the circumstances she did the best she could. I think the saving grace in Georgia’s life was her boarding school and the stability that it provided. Plus the fact that, she is clearly an intelligent girl, we do not know who her father is, but I assume her intelligence and placid nature must have come from him. I imagine that Georgia will go along with Alicia’s plans for her to a certain extent but hopefully pursue a career in something a bit more worthwhile and lasting. What is certain is that I am sure Georgia will prove to be a very successful woman of whom Alicia will be undoubtedly proud.
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Comment number 7.
At 6th Aug 2010, Bob wrote:I was quite shocked by this documentary, Alicia is a terrible mother and I would say that probably the only decent decision she ever made was to send Georgia to boarding school (although this was probably more of a decision made by her friend John who considered Georgia's education important, or a convenient child-minding service considering her view of education). The school has clearly been the greatest positive influence in her life and is responsible for her growing into the mature, intelligent, focussed and confident young lady that she is.
Without the boarding school, the main influence in Georgia's life would be her mother and she would most definitely now be following in her footsteps. I can't believe she let her miss 3 weeks of school for her own selfish vanity - could she not have put her on a plane home? And as for the whole John Terry tabloid story - well it appears that Alicia gave a very explicit interview to said tabloid, detailing every intimate sexual exploit with Mr Terry - so then to tell her daughter that she isn't a 'slapper' is laughable. If she doesn't want her daughter to be affected by her actions then don't do them - this is clearly a case of kiss and tell to raise her tabloid profile. It is easy to shrug off and laugh at Alicia's attempts to stear her daughter into 'modelling' but this is only possible because we know Georgia is a strong-minded young lady, it could all too easily have gone the other way. As I said at the beginning - she is a terrible mother!
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Comment number 8.
At 9th Aug 2010, U14560718 wrote:This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the house rules. Explain.
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Comment number 9.
At 10th Aug 2010, L66ELA wrote:Whilst I understand that Alicia has had a very difficult personal life and am glad that she has survived it as well as she has, I found it difficult to view the way she depended on Geaorgia with no real concern for Georgias needs.
Alicia appears to have become professionally manipulative of the media and this programme is no exeption! It began with her actively encouraging her 14 year old daughter to strip off and undergo cosmetic surgery as soon as she hit 16, within 1 hour it ended with a total U-turn of her opinion, exactly the sort of thing us 'general public' love to see. How many hearts did she win over with that sudden change of mind? Georgia on the other hand, seems totally genuine, mature, caring and ambitious, attributes which her private education can undoubtedly take a huge amount of credit for.
I do not dislike Alicia Douvall (whilst I do question the morals of her repetitive kiss and tell stories), in fact I believe she has achieved the best that she could have with what life has handed her, however Georgia's life, holds many different opportunities to those of her mother and hopefully she will be able to achieve the best that she can with them. My suggestion is that she uses her intelligence and knowledge of the celebrity world to become a cosmetic surgeon and make millions from clients like her mother!
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Comment number 10.
At 13th Aug 2010, Rebecca Dakin - The Girlfriend Experience wrote:Some of these comments are shocking, how anyone can call her a good mother I do not know. In my opinion it is Georgia playing the mother role.
I wrote the text below for my blog, because I felt very strongly about this programme...
I was in awe of Alicia Duvall’s amazing 14 year old daughter. How a neurotic, self obsessed and completely irresponsible woman can produce and raise such a grounded, sweet natured and patient child who is so accepting, loyal, understanding and protective of her Mum astounds me.
It never ceases to amaze me how children with such irresponsible parents can almost become the parent or guardian angel of sorts, offering support, guidance and acceptance to their shocking role model parents. I think it makes them incredibly special people.
Alicia’s Mum’s priority seemed to be very childishly trying to guide her down her own traumatised path of glamour, cosmetic surgery, self obsession, body dysmorphia. The more Georgia voiced opinions of not wanting to go down that route, the more she tried to force her down it. Testing her will power and goading her; I guess it has become some what of a game with her.
Stating boldly to the camera Alicia says ‘I’ve told her she can have a boob job when she’s 16!’ What sort of parent wants to pass on their insecurities to an innocent, undeveloped child? It’s irresponsible, and a mild form of abuse. ‘I don’t want one’ protests Georgia, and it falls on deaf ears. ‘You can bleach your hair blonde if you want’, she adds to Georgia, who is clearly disinterested, and not offended with her mum’s obsession for her to change her looks.
Alicia is reported to have had over a 100 cosmetic procedures and around 15 on her breasts. Why on earth she isn’t trying to keep her beautiful daughter from going down the route of disfiguring her body like any normal parent would I have no idea.
From watching the programme I do however know that Georgia, despite her mum, is a very grounded individual, and after watching the problems and pain, stress and gore of her mothers constant surgery, I think it’s pretty certain that she’ll probably never even have a drop of botox!
Alicia is one of those annoying mum’s that is obsessed with being ‘friends’ with her daughter. Georgia points out on a number of occasions, ‘but you’re my mum’, and Alicia takes great offence to this. I got the feeling she was needy and lonely, to be so clearly dependent of her daughter.
A close male friend of the family, who took both Georgia and Alicia under his wing (Georgia has never met her Dad, and I’m unsure if Alicia knows who it is) points out that Alicia’s behaviour is because she’s scared of losing Georgia, so she’s trying to make her into a mini her, so that instead of normal mother/daughter activities – shopping, lunch, spas et cetera, they can go glamour modelling and have surgery together. It’s a disturbing thought.
Alicia wants Georgia to go to stage school, leave without doing A Levels and go into glamour modelling and acting to become famous. Georgia however loves acting, and doesn’t want to do it for the fame. She wants to continue her studies through further education, something her Mum can’t get her head around. ‘She came out of my womb!’ exclaims Alicia, incredulous, ‘how can she possibly be so different?’ How naïve of her to think that watching her mum continually go under the knife, never being happy with how she looks, and her desperation for attention (Alicia is notorious for her kiss and tells), would make her want to choose that life for herself.
Georgia isn’t embarrassed of her mum, and adamantly states that she doesn’t care what anyone else thinks or says about her mum. This girl is simply adorable.
Georgia realises and is probably thankful that she is different to her Mum, and she accepts her mum for who she is. Georgia understands that her mum’s troubles stem from abuse as a child. However she refers to her as ‘perfect’ saying she’d never change her for anyone else. Sadly Alicia is not as accepting of her daughter. Alicia refers to her daughter as ‘the squarest person she knows’ because of her interest in Biology and McBeth, and tells her daughter ‘you have to use this’ using her hands and running them down her body to demonstrate her meaning – that as a woman it’s better to use what you have – your surgically enhanced body, to get what you want, instead of using your brain. God help us! She seems irritated at Georgia’s passion for learning, and doesn’t even know what subjects she is studying at school.
They go to America for a few days for Georgia to go to a modelling agency, clearly to please her Mum and for Alicia to do some modelling, and generally have a short break. When Alicia is working she says to Georgia that she should ‘go and do something productive’, which bizarrely in Alicia’s world means having your hair done. Even Georgia is astute enough to know that going to the hair dressers is not a productive activity.
When she arrives one of her tear drop boobs has turned around, and the drama and stress is all about Alicia, she has to get it sorted immediately, lamenting that she can’t possibly go out in public, even though it’s not obviously visible to the viewer under her clothes, so spends hours on the phone trying to find a surgeon to operate on her. Because of her many operations and various complications no one will operate on her.
Georgia admits that it’s a shame she can’t do ‘fun’ things on her holidays, like going to the beach, because ‘mum won’t wear a bikini’. Eventually after a lot of wailing and distress, Alicia realises that no surgeon is going to magically appear, and that nothing can be done at that moment, and more importantly she doesn’t actually seem in any pain, so it’s purely about the way it looks, and finally decides that she is going to take Georgia to her modelling audition. She implies it’s what Georgia wants to do, but it’s clear to me Georgia’s doing it to please her mum.
Alicia moans afterwards that Georgia isn’t ‘excited’ enough after her modelling audition, and is oblivious as to why.
When Alicia finds a surgeon to operate it’s 2000 miles away, so both her and Georgia pack up and trek across America to sort out Alicia’s boob, where poor Georgia has to miss out on 2 weeks of school, when she is preparing for GCSE’s and there’s no home tutoring available in that area. Even when Georgia protests, Alicia doesn’t listen because it’s all about her. Good natured Georgia doesn’t make a fuss, it’s clear she’s unhappy at having to miss school, but she just accepts that when she gets home she’ll have to work 3 times as hard to catch up.
She gets sent the print outs for her class work but with no books or computer to learn from she can’t do any of her school work. Alicia has Georgia draining her boobs for her, and even though she says she can fly back and doesn’t have to stay, it’s clear she needs someone to look after her, so sweet Georgia is obviously going to stay to look after her Mum. I cannot believe how selfish and self obsessed this woman is.
I wonder how many children are in similar situations. I personally know of two people that despite their parents have grown into responsible, caring and well grounded individuals. But what about those children that are not so lucky and end up equally as messed up as their parents?
Ironically at the end of the show Alicia, after a rare moment of clarity and basic common sense, reflects that considering her glamour modelling friends ended up dancing, escorting, drinking or in jail; it’s perhaps not a good thing to be trying to push her daughter down that route. Finally the penny appears to have dropped!
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Comment number 11.
At 10th Sep 2010, richardp wrote:I cannot understand how anyone can describe Alicia as a good mother. She is incredibly lucky to have such a normal, mature daughter that puts up with her and looks after her so well considering the upbringing she has given her.
I can only hope that Georgia remains as head strong and is able to embark on the career of her choosing. And doesn't have the boob job her mum desperately wants her to have. Insane.
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