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A yuletide poem from me

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Comedy Dave | 12:17 UK time, Tuesday, 11 December 2007


‘Christmas time is nearly here,
Online shopping for turkey and beer,
Confused faces in retail outlets,
They want to go home, but they’re not allowed yet,
What the heck do we buy for your mum?
Will she think ‘Tickle Me Elmo’ is fun?
Barged on the escalator by hoodies and chavs,
Sore feet and fingers cut by shopping bags,
Oh sod it, get vouchers the real gift of choice,
Who cares if they’re offended, it’s not about presents it’s about Jesus!’

Seasonal Thoughts

Dave.


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  • 1.
  • At 03:04 PM on 08 Jan 2008,
  • rosie taylor--x wrote:

hiya dave,

that was hilarious!!

haha

i av jst finishd a 2 1/2 hour exam!

n u jst cheeered me up!!

thanks

happy new year 2 all of radio 1!!

xxxxxxxxxxx

  • 2.
  • At 12:03 PM on 18 Dec 2007,
  • Simon Chapman wrote:

Hi Dave,

Season's greeting to you also...you are a poetry genius....

I am wondering what Borat's version might be like?

Have a great Christmas to all the R1 Team

Simon from Chatham

  • 3.
  • At 05:25 PM on 13 Dec 2007,
  • Beth wrote:

Loved it Dave - one problem though; in your poem you say that Christmas is about Jesus, which is quite right too - but then at the end why do you say 'seasonal thoughts'?!
You just said that Christmas is a christian festival, then you go all p.c. on us and say 'seasonal thoughts'!!
I say bring back the merry christmas!!

  • 4.
  • At 05:17 PM on 12 Dec 2007,
  • david wrote:

please post the interview with ali gee on the webite .......

  • 5.
  • At 06:22 PM on 11 Dec 2007,
  • wrote:

Dear Mr Comedy Dave,

I thought you might like to read a song that is very popular, here at Homeward, during yuletide.

On a bitter winter's night
By the gates of METZ,
I waited in the fading light,
In my thin torn VEST.

Only just across the way,
Was a sausage SHOP;
But it was no good to me,
Pfennigs I had NOT.

On a bitter winter's night
By the gates of ULM,
I waited in the fading light,
With my fingers NUMB

There are more verses in a similar vein - documented in my biography.

Yours Faithfully

Uncle

  • 6.
  • At 05:52 PM on 11 Dec 2007,
  • Victoria wrote:

Nice one Dave!

BTW Rachel, your Swedish is excellent!

  • 7.
  • At 04:50 PM on 11 Dec 2007,
  • Mic wrote:

Don't care about Coca Cola, rhymes
or a rip of the Saint Klaus.
Time to make people happy, smile
So put the Borat interview Live

(and give us a link)

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