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It looks like the sort of 'special move' that Princess Anne used to do at all the equestrian events

And Minehead Council's Award for Best Sand Sculpture goes to Lance Corporal Heeley

Due to his precise physique, Lance Corporal Heeley was in charge of removing the horses' ear-wax

Unfortunately, Yeoman suddenly woke up and thought he saw a carrot ...

Shergar and Lord Lucan are finally discovered

Yeoman always needed to be comforted after watching "The Godfather"

Lance Corporal Heeley wondered whether Soho was ready for a lap-dancing horse

Yeoman was enjoying Ascot, but this was the last lap

Special move? We used to call it falling over.

Lance Corporal Heeley was letting his work get on top of him

R-equining position

When I asked for a horse blanket I wasn't expecting this!

At least you're treated better than a Gurkha.

As with the other sort of tattoo, Lance Corporal Heeley was worried that the effects of this might be indelible too

They even ignored the "Please Keep Off The Sand" signs

As Yeoman had now passed away, Lance Corporal Heeley wondered whether he ought to apply to be on "Flog It"

Lance Corporal Heeley was hopging to be put out to stud too

Sorry.

Lance Corporal Heeley was hoping to be put out to stud too

It had been an exhausting swim to get to the beach. But things were not looking good – this was France..

Heeley suspected that there might have been more than hay in the nosebag..

It was a shock for Lance Corporal Heeley at the Badminton Horse Trials after Yeoman was found guilty

"There, there. I'm pretty sure horses can't catch swine flu."

HEELEY. WE'LL HAVE NONE OF THAT HORSEPLAY ON PARADE.

After Lance Corporal Heeley's lapdog passed away, a horse just wasn't the same

Determined not to have wheels fitted inside his hooves, Yeoman prevents being given Heeley.

Lance Corporal Heeley found the ear-wax stains were often difficult to get out

Yes, the rolling over part does need a bit of work.

The Royal British Legion was sure their remake of Black Beauty would be a great success if only they could get better costumes.

He likes playing dead actually

I'd love to join you in the Charge of the Light Brigade, it's just that Dobbin didn't get a good night's sleep and is a bit lethargic this morning.

Lance Corporal Heeley had been hoping for a Lipizzaner Horse, not a Lapunzipper horse

Maybe it's a big horse - I'm a Londoner

Suffered an injury at work through no fault of your own? Equine-Comp can help you win compensation!!!

Just nipping down the Nag'sHead for a quick one

The Equine Mafia's trade mark "Bell Boy in the bed" was enough to scare Irish Invader out of the places at Aintree...

If Carlsberg did sandpits..

Yes, well I got my foot out of the stirrup before we went down, but I quite failed on pushing away as we went down.

He's been a bit down lately

Lance Corporal Heeley couldn't go on parade as he was feeling a little horse

"If our love is wrong, then I don't want to be right."

The bellboy was expecting a decent tip for carrying THIS piece of luggage.

The choreography for the regimental production of 'They Shoot Horses Don't They?' was shaping up nicely

On ³ÉÈËÂÛ̳1 tonight, 'Horse Doctor', a drama set in a Crimean MASH unit, where Dobbin treats the sick and wounded.

The love that dare not speak its mane.

I love you too, but I still don't think my parents will approve..

"Yeah, well, you don't get to be a 12 year old Lance Corporal without the love of a good horse."

Charge of The Light Sleepers Brigade.

We call it "Yeoman on the Guard".

Yeoman? a gift from George Bush ...used to be called Yo! Blair.

"Heeley! For God's sake soldier, that looks terrible! Your hat's crooked!"

"Yes, I know I promised you the Seychelles."

"Yeoman, get up, the kids that built the sandcastle you're lying are forming an angry mob!"

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Horse and His Boy

Everytime I put those damn Heely's on this happens!!

Very impressive, but you were supposed to put the boots backwards in the stirrups.

If he lies like this any longer, I'll be called 'Florence of Arabia'

With no other horses near, Yeoman shows off his Cristiano Ronaldo impersonation.

You think the Horse is a problem?! This sand gets everywhere!

Bag piper protests were reaching fever pitch

With the Queen in attendance, Lance Corporal Heeley had to do something when his zip broke

Lance Corporal Stephen Heeley and Yeoman enjoy a stable relationship

Climb up here Joe, soon we'll be flying, I can go just as fast with two

'Brokeback Mountain 2' looked like being even more sensational

Despite feeling a little hoarse, Lance Corporal Stephen Healey bravely soldiered on.

The irony of Yeoman glue sniffing had not gone unoticed by Lance Corporal Heeley, he just wished it wasn't superglue.......

At Glasgow Barracks, Yeoman is trained in head-butting

Yeoman would punish those who refused to mount properly.

Instead of rosettes, future winners would have a little man pinned to their foreheads

Yeoman was inconsolable about his impending transfer to the Gurkha regiment and that he would be exported at the end of his service.

Government advice at this time is to sit down if feeling a little hoarse.

Buttons still wasn't sure about the pantomime's new ending

After the defence cuts it was either 'Be a donkey at Blackpool' or 'Be a meat pie in France'

There was no denying Heeley was good, but his Sigfrid & Roy routine was never going to be fully realised at Butlins.

For health and safety reasons, lookalikes stand in for Charles and Camilla on the planned royal tour of Mexico.

OK, he's ready. Now, he'd like a heart pierced by an arrow and 'Mother'. What do you mean it's not that sort of tattoo!

Two of the Borrowers discovered in bowl of rum n raisin ice cream

Trying to be the centaur of attention

It had been a great night out, but Stephen was glad he, at least, had given the ketamine a miss.

"I'm feeling a little hoarse"
"Don't worry Yeoman, you'll be fine on the day"

Lance Corporal Heeley wished they hadn't given him John Wayne's stunt horse to ride into battle

"Yeah, I know Patrick Swayze didn't drop her in the original 'Dirty Dancing', but this horse is REALLY heavy"

Lance Corporal Heeley called his sick horse Citizen Kane ... because he was a horse unwell

Lance Corporal Heeley wondered how much he'd get if he tried flogging a dead horse

All I did was tell him the Lunchtime Bonus Question was coming back on Fridays and he fainted!

"I'm just not sure about this new Spanish horse - every afternoon it's the same..."

"Sir, that's the ten million piece 3D jigsaw of the horse done, now can I PLEASE go to bed?"

A contestant relaxes before his turn in 'Extreme Surfing'..

Why the long face ?

(With homage to Tennyson)

Into the valley of death?
Not bleedin likely Heeley. They’ll have to make do with 599!

The tap dancing horse fainted after being told he was going to have to be on after Susan Boyle in the semis of 'Britain's Got Talent'

With a diet consisting mainly of sprouts and cabbage, Heeley plotted his revenge.

Based upon a novel by Michael Morpurgo ...

Some of the King's Horses and Men needed counselling after the Humpty-Dumpty event.

"Sit. Lie down. Play dead."

"It followed me home, Ma'am. Can I keep it?"

Royal Tattoo re-enacts Buckaroo

"Look son, your audition was fabulous, but a truly great Bond villain always has a CAT...."

Malingering Mount.

To commemorate the withdrawal of UK troops from Iraq:
"Hors de combat"

Apparently, if you trade this one in you get £2000 of a new one - as long as it has lower emissions!