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A toast to William Webb Ellis (26)

• Ben Dirs
• 4 Oct 07, 09:54 AM

Menton, Cote d'Azur - I have to be honest, I鈥檓 not really into visiting graves. As my nan used to say, you鈥檙e a long time toes-up - what鈥檚 the point in hanging about with dead people while you鈥檙e still alive?

But I made an exception for William Webb Ellis, the man often credited with inventing rugby union and without whom this magnificent trip of ours may never have happened.

The Webbler lies in the in Menton, a resort nestled between Monaco and the Italian border.

The former pupil of Rugby School spent the last six months of his life trying to recover from TB in the dry Mediterranean air, although, given some of the gradients in this town, he might have been better off in Holland.

And, having failed to find a place to park after two hours driving, Tommy must have wished he鈥檇 died a few miles up the road in Nice.

I鈥檓 not sure what campervans ever did to Menton, but it had a whacking great beef with Le Bloggernaut and we were eventually forced to schlep back from a supermarket a couple of miles out of town.

Mercifully, the yomp was worth it, not only because we were able to raise a little toast to the main man, but also because the views over the Med from his resting place are enough to make even David Campese break out into an impromptu song and dance.

Word on the street is that Menton is the thinking man鈥檚 Monaco 鈥� officially the warmest place on the and, my Lonely Planet tells me, big on lemons.

It has also gone large on the World Cup, with a rugby exhibition up and running and a Webb Ellis Way - a series of illustrated panels explaining the history of rugby - in place.

If only it had let us park on its streets, I might have been able to take a look myself.

Our otherwise stressful jaunt round Menton did include one moment of light relief. On realising we鈥檇 travelled 10 seconds or so across the Italian border, Tommy decided to chuck what looked to me like a highly-illegal U-turn on the promenade.

Cue irate Italian chap on moped giving us a volley of abuse, gesticulating wildly and cuffing Le Bloggernaut鈥檚 wing mirror with the back of his hand. Stereotypes, aren鈥檛 they brilliant?

Onto the weekend鈥檚 festivities, and you鈥檒l not be surprised to learn that the we鈥檝e met are in typically bullish mood ahead of their quarter-final with in Marseille.

On Wednesday, I bumped into one in a campsite toilet and it turned out he had rather cleverly tweaked that marvellous old Dennis Lillee-Jeff Thompson taunt:

鈥淎shes to Ashes, dust to dust, if Giteau don鈥檛 get ya, Mortlock must.鈥�

I was about to fire back a stinging riposte when I realised he鈥檇 inadvertently urinated on my feet, which is perhaps the biggest drawback to wearing flip-flops.

In truth, his errant aim was probably a blessing. What was I going to say that would cut him down to size? 鈥淵eh, but we鈥檝e got Andy Farrell and he can kick the ball down the middle of the pitch really, really far鈥︹��

The Aussie fans even expect their pack to hold its own, which is bordering on a miracle when you consider it features several players beasted by England at Twickenham only two years ago.

That said, it is forecast to rain on Saturday and anyone who has ever played rugby at any level will know a greasy ball is one of the game鈥檚 great levellers.

As a decidedly mediocre full-back in my day, that鈥檚 a line I鈥檝e trotted out plenty of times in the past and one that I鈥檓 sticking with.

We return to Marseille today and Tommy will no doubt fill you in on the atmos ahead of the match on Friday. With droves of English, Australian, South African and Fijian fans heading into town, it should all be going a little bit crackers.

I鈥檝e had a look on the web and it seems you can pick up an England-Australia ticket for 50 squid, but I鈥檓 going to stick my neck out and say you鈥檙e better off just rocking up and bagging one outside the Stade Velodrome a few minutes before show-time.

We鈥檒l be there at some point, but only if Le Bloggernaut, like some giant mechanical witch, can make it out of Menton without being torched by the locals.

An aside to finish. It鈥檚 not often you stumble across a restaurant at the bottom of your campsite which offers views of Monte Carlo, but that鈥檚 what happened to Tommy and I last night, which was, as they say on the Cote d鈥橝zur, a bit of a touch.

And as I leant back and surveyed the red, yellow and blue tricolore pinned to the ceiling (you鈥檙e still allowed to smoke in France) and knocked back my second post-duck , I thought to myself, 鈥淲illiam Webb Ellis, I think I love you.鈥�

Ben Dirs is a 成人论坛 Sport journalist travelling around France in a camper van with Tom Fordyce.

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