Golding creates interest with the exotic setting, which includes a "lagoon" and "jungle." This is contrasted with the ordinariness of the boy, who is wearing school uniform. The "grey" uniform is dull compared to the "vision of red and yellow" of the bird. This contrast means the reader is left wondering why the boys are in this jungle. This creates interest for the reader.
Golding also uses a long sentence, followed by dialogue. The dialogue begins before we are aware of who is speaking. The voice does not have a body at first. Using the pronoun "it" to refer to the voice, rather than who is behind it, creates a sense of mystery. This mystery is heightened by the fact Golding does not tell us the names of the characters – one is simply "the fair boy" and the other one is just a voice at this point.
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Using the name of the author shows an awareness of the fact there is a writer behind the text.
The points are supported with short quotations which are embedded into the sentences.
The point about the contrast is developed, with detail about the colour supporting it.
The answer then goes on to explain what the effect of this is on the reader.
This candidate would be awarded a Competence Level 3 for this style of answer.