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The idea was that we would get Hilary - who is about to release an album called 'Dignity' - to tell us about some of the most embarrassing moments of her life, particularly those in which she LOST her dignity, see? And then, we also wanted to illustrate these tales of woe using fuzzy felt (can't quite remember why now...). But we could only get fuzzy felt faces, so Hilary sat making a face while she talked. And it was nice!

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ChartBlog: Hilary Duff, welcome to ChartBlog.
Hilary: Thank you!

ChartBlog: First of all we'd like to ask you about embarrassing scrapes that you might've got into at school.
Hilary: Scrapes. Is that little fights, or...or...what is that?

ChartBlog: Sorry, we're being terribly British about this! Did you get into much trouble?
Hilary: I didn't get into very much trouble in school, but I remember I would get into trouble for talking a lot. And once [in hushed tones] I cheated on a test.

ChartBlog: [gasps, clutches pearls, etc]
Hilary: I know, isn't that terrible? I got in trouble too, I got caught.

ChartBlog: How old were you at the time?
Hilary: It was driving me crazy, I had to turn myself in. I was, like, in third grade. It was really stupid, it was like a spelling test, and I looked over and cheated. I know! Because I was such a bad speller and it was always embarrassing, you know? And I totally cheated, isn't that horrible?

ChartBlog: I think, third grade, we can let you off that.
Hilary: [laughs] Thank you!

ChartBlog: Obviously you've spent a large part of your life on screen - what's the most cringeworthy thing you've ever had to do on film?
Hilary: A lot on my TV show I had to do really awful things like be covered in slime or have a food fight, or - I had to dissect an octopus once, which was really disgusting.

ChartBlog: Ew.
Hilary: I know, I know! And then actually the other day I was doing a TV show here and they made me learn how to make kebabs. [She pronounces it 'kebobs' first, then 'kebabs', trying out the sound.] What d'you call 'em? Kebabs?

ChartBlog: We say kebabs.
Hilary: We say 'kebobs'. But I had to do like the raw meat and all that stuff, and that was really gross.

ChartBlog: Have you ever had any clumsy instances on a TV set?
Hilary: I dunno. I've had one on my tour. Yeah, I fell on stage. It was pretty embarrassing. And then it's happened a couple of times since then, and I just kind of - now I laugh it off and don't get as embarrassed by it any more because it happens, but the first time I remember being like "oh my God, I don't even wanna get up". It's really embarrassing.

ChartBlog: The problem with being a solo artist, of course, is that you can't hope everyone was looking at someone else at that point...
Hilary: That's true. [Laughs.]

ChartBlog: Have you ever been caught making a face behind someone's back when you thought they couldn't see you?
Hilary: Yes, of course! I'm trying to think of an instance...

ChartBlog: I'm just going to get some in-progress shots of the fuzzy felts, if I may.
Hilary: Okay. This is me in the '50s.

ChartBlog: Oh, really? That's awesome.
Hilary: [giggles] I don't know! Okay, let's see. [Re: the fuzzy felt.] There's no way I can make this look like me, but I'm trying! Let's see, what did I do? I had a really mean Spanish teacher that I used to make faces - she used to call me Maria, because she said there was no Spanish name for my name, and we all got Spanish names in class, and she gave everyone else a Spanish name but me. She was like, "well, you have to be Maria", and I was like, "but that's not my name!" So I would make faces behind her back all the time, and I failed Spanish, and my mom had to come in and have meetings with her all the time. It was bad. And then - did your mom ever tell you when you were a kid, if you guys get in a tiff and then she turns to walk away and you make a face, and she knows you're going to make one, so she's like "I SAW that"?

ChartBlog: Sure.
Hilary: So for the longest time I thought she had eyes in the back of her head.

ChartBlog: What's the worst photograph that you've seen of yourself that you didn't know was being taken?
Hilary: Um...

ChartBlog: ...or indeed one that you did know was being taken, but you couldn't do anything about it?
Hilary: I see bad photographs of myself all the time. I can't figure out which one I think is the worst. There was, actually just coming into London, there was photographers right when you got out of the airport, and I'd been on, like, a 12-hour flight or however long it takes to fly over here - I had no makeup on, I had a hat on and whatever - it wasn't so bad, but I was saying something to someone, and so I was making this really weird face, and I was like, "gosh, that's horrible."

ChartBlog: Are you quite skilled at getting your makeup put on in a moving vehicle?
Hilary: I am, yes.

ChartBlog: So you never have that problem where you get out of the car with eyeliner around your ears or anything?
Hilary: No, because sometimes I'm more focused on doing my makeup than I am on driving, which can be a BAD THING. But I'm totally guilty of doing that in the mirror, and like the mascara, and trying to drive with your elbows type of thing, you know? But I've never gotten out and had a horrible - I guess sometimes the lighting's bad and you're like "I have too much blush on", you know? In the daylight, you're like: "argh, too much!"

ChartBlog: What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done in front of a boy?
Hilary continues arranging the fuzzy felts while she thinks of an answer.

ChartBlog: I'll get some more in-progress shots while you're thinking...
Hilary: I don't really know what all of these things are!

ChartBlog: In fairness, I'm not terribly sure either...
Hilary: Maybe these are eyelashes?

ChartBlog: Feel free to be as abstract as you like.
Hilary: Okay. So, um, when I was filming a video, this guy - who actually ended up being my boyfriend - came over and we were having lunch and we stepped outside my trailer and there were grates, you know? The stairs down, and I had heels on, and my heel went in, and I just ate it. [Mimes comedy faceplant.] Right there, and he was in front of me so he didn't actually see it, but he turned around and I wasn't there, I was on the ground, and he was like, "whoa, what happened to you?" That was really embarrassing, so maybe that.

ChartBlog: Have you ever said something during an interview and then thought "argh, I wish I hadn't said that"?
Hilary: Yeah, of course. Probably not too long ago! You mean about someone, or...?

ChartBlog: Anything at all, really. Anything that you didn't think sounded great when you heard it. Like we once interviewed someone and we asked her what her favourite film was, and she meant to say Pirates of the Carribbean, but she ended up saying Carrots of the Pirabbean.
Hilary: Oh, that's kinda funny! Well, sometimes that happens to me too - oh, I said one the other day! What'd I say? Sometimes my brain works faster than I can get my mouth to work, so I'll mix words that aren't supposed to be mixed, and I said - oh gosh, what was it? Oh, I can't even think of it, I'm sorry. I feel like I'm gonna walk out of the room and then remember exactly what it was! Yeah, I mix up my words or do stuff like that all the time.

ChartBlog: What's the outfit that you most look back on and think "I wish I hadn't worn that""?
Hilary: At the Britney Spears Crossroads premiere, about four years ago, I don't know what I was thinking, but I had the worst outfit on ever and I wish I'd never worn it. It was like a matching jacket with matching pants, with teal-clothed leather, it was really, really hideous.

ChartBlog: It doesn't sound great, if I'm honest...
Hilary: No no, it was horrible! [Laughs.]

ChartBlog: Last question: when was the last time you got in trouble for doing something you shouldn't have been doing?
Hilary: [has a good think about this] I hope that you're going to be able to cut all that thinking time out of there!

ChartBlog: Don't worry, it'll be heavily edited.
Hilary: Oh good! [To her manager] Troy, what do you think? The last time I got in trouble for something I shouldn't have been doing? Maybe...I can't get in trouble with my mom any more. I haven't really ever got in trouble with the police...
Troy: Yes you have.
Hilary: When?
Troy: You got a ticket, and you knew it.
Hilary: And I knew it?
Troy: You got your first ticket - you parked and you didn't pay the - remember? It wasn't a moving violation, it was a parking ticket.
Hilary: No no, that's more scandalous, because - no no, no no no, this is the thing -

ChartBlog: Really, it can be anything.
Hilary: Oh, really?

ChartBlog: Like turning up late or whatever.
Hilary: I've been kind of late all day today.
Troy: What about that day when I called you at eight, I got to your house at nine and you weren't ready on time?
Hilary: Okay. So, the other day, I had a really busy day, and Troy - he's one of my managers, and I was working with him that day, and I had stuff to do running all over town, and he called me and I purposely didn't pick up the phone. 'Cos it was like, you know when you're half asleep, and you're really tired, and you hear the phone ringing but you don't really connect that you need to pick it up? It was a little bit of that and a little bit of me being "I'm so tired, I can't do that!" and he's ringing my doorbell like an hour later and I had just rolled out of bed. I was like "umm, we're going to be late, I have to go shower really fast". We had photoshoots all day, but it didn't turn out to be so bad. And then the other time is, in Los Angeles, if you run a red light, they take a picture of you. I really didn't mean to run a red light, but it was late and I was driving, and I'd been working all day, and my friend was in the car with me and he's like"you totally just ran that light!" and I was like "oh my God!" and I didn't mean to, and thank God there was no cars on the road. But they took a picture and I saw the flash, and they focus in on your VIN number, which is on your windshield, and I had a valet ticket covering the VIN number so they couldn't send me the ticket! It was pretty, like, I felt a little delinquent. Never had to pay it! [Laughs.]

Your playful ChartBlog interviewer was: Steve P

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SPECIAL TREAT! Here's Hilary's new single, 'With Love'.

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