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Make an effort to learn the language

My husband, son of 8 weeks and myself moved to Andalucía in June 2003. After renting several properties in areas as diverse as the mountainous Competa, Puerto Banus by the sea and Antequera we finally found a house to renovate in a small town called Mollina, 13km from Antequera. Even though my husband and I had been to Spain many times, at different times of the year, we were both still shocked at how hot it gets in the middle of the summer. Having a small baby with us made it impossible to go outside after 11am each day, which meant we never got to meet people or make friends. When you spend 24 hours a day with someone (no matter how much you love them) for months on end, it really tests your relationship. Contrastingly, the winters are really cold. As there is no central heating or double glazing in old properties such as the one we bought there have been many times when I have just wanted to run away and come back to England for the normality of it all. In Spain it is either too hot to go out or too cold, and when it rains in the mountains, it really rains, usually for days on end. After trying to learn the language to a basic level, we learnt that the region we had moved to had its own dialect and that nobody could understand a word we said, and vice versa. So we have had to re-learn the language to make ourselves understood, and it is proving much more difficult than we ever expected! I still don't know if it was the right thing to do, as my son is now at an age (18 months) where he needs to mix with other children. Having only a basic grasp of the language makes it very hard to integrate in the community. We are also the only English family with a young child; the other 'foreigners' are mostly retired couples, so sometimes we feel very lonely and isolated, with only each other to talk to. We are back in England at the moment selling our house here, then we will be going back to our little town, probably to sell that house as well, and move somewhere with more people like ourselves, so that we can make new friends and introduce our son to other families. My main advice to anyone thinking of moving abroad is to learn as much of the language as you can, even if you move to a tourist area. The locals are unlikely to speak English, and they will appreciate you trying to speak Spanish, and will be more welcoming.

Sent by: Jacinta

Comments

Adriana 2010-11-28

I moved to Barcelona 3 years ago when I got married. My husband is from Barcelona and he did not want to leave Spain so I moved and I did not know a word of Spanish. I began taking intense Spanish courses and within a year and half I became fluent. It was even a little harder because in Barcelona a lot people speak Catalan, so I had to take classes for Catalan as well. Catalan was a little easier because I know French and Spanish and it's a mix of both. Nevertheless, moving to another country where you do not speak the language is extremely difficult.

I would recommend for your family and yourself to move to a bigger city like part of Spain like Granada, Seville, Madrid, Alicante, Valencia, more known cities where there are diverse people and locals that you can find that come from the same background. Just keep in mind that every part of Spain has their own dialect and sometimes another local language like in Barcelona and Valencia

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John 2009-02-06

I know how you feel, Jacinta. I've been in Australia for 28 years and still can't say 'G'day' properly.

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Sue 2008-06-10

It's good to hear someone else who finds it hard to cope with the cold here in southern Spain! See my diary on this website ... The heat doesn't bother me so much since it doesn't last long. No-one in the UK ever believes me when I complain about the cold and even other English people who live here think I'm a little over the top!

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Jamie 2006-01-22

Couldn't agree more. When I go to Ibiza and speak Spanish the Spanish people they are always so much more friendlier when they see you are tryiung to speak their language. It's much more satisfying than just speaking English.

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